Thursday, December 2, 2010

Delhi Diaries Part II - Friendships!

Friendships Change. Friends Don't. or is it the other way round?

I don't know and hence am confused. 

Two people, sworn to be best friends forever. Move in to live together[Mistake #1]. Figure out, what can be better than having your best friend living with you full time. Life in the same city, but with different sets of people. New friends, New relations, New House, New everything. Time moves on, and living in the same house, makes two best friends drift apart. 

You love your friend for all the fun and craziness they bring in your life, but you need structure and responsibility in a house-mate, right? Your home and all the responsibilities are left at home where your father and mother look after everything, you don't want a house-mate/friend telling you what is right and what is wrong, right? 

People Change. People Adapt. People Adjust. People Should. Man is a social animal, isn't he? Thank goodness they weren't married to each other. Otherwise, there would be another tale of Divorce. 

The two friends in some corner of their hearts still love each other (I think!) but situation has made it such that they cannot stand each others guts! 

It makes me uncomfortable, coz I love both of them, and somehow, it looks like I have made a choice, between the two of them. I didn't mean to. When issues and matters were small, I tried reasoning things out. But when it was blown out of proportion, I didn't do anything, mainly because:

- I didn't want to make a choice.
- I assumed two grown-ups will know how to handle their own issues, without having a kid interfere. 
- I - in my craziest dream - didn't imagine, that it'll last this long, and become this big!

Life, has taught me a great deal about friendships. And I want to list some of them here, to remind me someday incase I happen to forget:

1. Never Ever have money matters un-resolved between friends. It somehow brings its ugly face sooner or later to spoil any relationship.

2. Never forget birthdays. All those friends you made back when you were a kid, they don't know who you really are today, and honestly, they don't care. But they'll always remain special. Show them that.

3. Never EVER interfere in your friends relationships. Be friends with their better halves, but remember, ALWAYS - the person who introduced you to that person was your friend first. Let it stay that way.

4. When you meet friends of friends, do not at any point of time make your friend seem less important. If you're making any sort of plans, or you think your friendship with the new people seem increasing, Keep your friends in the loop. 

5. Be honest with a friend. You don't like something, say it. And just because you said it, don't expect your friend to change for you. If he or she feels you are right, they will take necessary action.

6. Accept them for who they are. Never judge them. They are your friends for a reason.

7. You don't need to be friendly to those people who were friends once, but don't respect you anymore. When competition / jealousy take over a certain friendship, it hasn't been friendship for quite some time now. Let go.

8. Stay in touch. [ I am majorly lacking here - and I feel soo soo soooo terrible, for not being able to do it]

As and when, I remember my other lessons, I shall list it down here, in my small little world. 

Now you maybe thinking, why the title of this post was Delhi Diaries?

Simply, I like the sound of it! :P :) 

Writing this, felt totally Liberating! I hope things improve, and love shall prevail!!


  1. :) :) stay in touch with me too!!!!!
    Are you coming to Bangalore. I will be there 25th to 5th.

  2. Thank you.for visiting my blog..Your work is incredible...

  3. Incredibly wise words! I follow a very simple dictum when it comes to choosing friends. Be with people who fill you with happiness and not sap you of energy with their constant whining.

    And judging a person is the worst thing you can do. Agree!

  4. Good words .. but i do think Friends change and friendships change toooo :)

    people change ...

    I am one of those who can vouch for it .. people are devious these days ,, :) so beaware is the best thing...

    and as purba says above be with people who make u smile and fill you with happiness..

    and yeah dont judge peole..

    God thoughts and advice lets see if i can do some of them he heh e


  5. So true sweetie.. You have penned down the same words which I always feel towards freindship :)..
    Well written !!

  6. Change is inevitable. Isn't it? People, Place or circumstances nothing remains same. Easier said than done but it is good to stay unattached enough to not be hurt and attached enough to still be human! :)