Words As A Form Of Life!!

Communication!

2011-11-14T00:25:00.000+05:30

I started writing to express myself when I first moved outof Bangalore. Writing gave me a high that no amount of mood enhancers couldinduce.

I took up a project, and, did NOT do it completely. I was atcrossroads, which didn’t allow me to express myself to even myself. Now that Iam back in Bangalore, I decided to take this up, yet again.

And as Sundays usually are at the Mallar household, we allsat to watch –We the People on NDTV 24x7. The discussion was around Love andSex and how it is portrayed in Hindi Cinema these days. The discussion from theTV set entered our living room, and took another form. We didn’t discuss loveand etc. in Bollywood, but we did discuss how children should vs. could beraised.

I told dad that I was scared of the possibility, as kidstoday are at such an advanced state in every aspect. The good are gettingbetter and the bad are getting worse.

Now, I tell my parents ALMOST everything. So, they usuallyknow who I am out with, where I’m going and what I’d be doing. But that is notthe scenario with kids these days. There is a mountain of lies that childrentell their parents, and somewhere down the line the parent don’t even knowtheir own children. Who they are, what they think, what they want etc… So, thechildren continue obliging their parents’ wishes and not voicing their owncreating a wide gap.

I had been urging my dad to write and voice his thoughts andthis is what he said:

" Communication between generations is very much needed whichis not there in families these days. And that is the reason for a lot ofdiscorded relations in families these days.

People (kids, mainly) have developed a split personalitywithin themselves. Split personality insuch a way that the line between the true self and the fake persona becomes ablur; because when the brain is told things repeatedly, it doesn't know whichto believe as true or untrue. And that simply will pass on generation togeneration.

When there is true communication, both the parties (Parents& Children) will be aware of the whereabouts and happenings, and not muchof guilt is involved. The younger generation will at least be liberated fromthe guilt of having to lie about who they are and moreover they will notsuccumb to worse measures in the hour of need.

Open communication between generations; for the oldergeneration to guide, to show the pitfalls, so that the younger generation willalways have a second opinion and a support system to live life the best waypossible.

Each person when expresses their true feelings will betterthe bonding and understanding between them. "

This last statement is true for any relationship to standthe test of time. Respect and love are shared and continuity is maintained.They say change is the only constant; and in this world where the changes areexponential; very few human relationships will stand the test of time.

So why not make these few relationships true andfun-filled?

So, on this happier note, I just want to announce – I amBACK! Again! ;)

And this time, I won’t be just talking about things aroundme; I’ll be going a little deeper. Coz, I have dad by my side! J J

Write again soon!

Baby Brother!!

2011-11-02T19:07:00.002+05:30

Went on a fabulous vacation with my brother!

The cutest thing ever!

Resize image

My first Gif! :)

I'm Baaaaack!

2011-08-08T15:29:00.000+05:30

I ca't believe it has been 50 days since I have posted in either blog spaces! The last post was on 18th June 2011! That does not mean 50 days of my 250 days have gone un-documented. Its just that, I did't want to write anything bad/sad on the blog. So, I chose not to publish posts. And then, I had lost continuity and didn't know what to do? How to go ahead with the challenge/ project of 250 to 25! I feel terrible, but the fact that, I'll be taking it up again should be penance enough. :) [My blog right? So, I decide the punishment! :P]

As I ctrl entered blogger today, I see it has changed almost completely. My first reaction to it? WHY?? Wasn't it good before? Now, the well defined line between wordpress and blogger seems to be minimizing. Ad I'm not liking it! :(

I am having to redefine most of the concepts in my life. What I used to believe in seems wrong. So, the two places where words are a form of my life will get to see more and more of this evolution. And I'm hopeful that the outcome is favorable to me. Also, I have decided, that there's nothing wrong in writing about the things I think are wrong or things that make me sad. End of the day, it is a learning in itself right?

V said, writing seems to be the only way you express your feelings Deeps! I agree. I have misplaced the capability of expressing myself to people. So, these days, I wasn't not writing. I was. I liked the part that noone was reading them. Its nice to write for yourself. I sat and saw Season 4,5 and 6 of Dawson's Creek all over again.I saw a lot of other movies. I went home. I met my little cousin who I share my birthday with. I saw a dear friend pass away. I went through a roller coaster of emotions in that week.

The 50 Missing Days will be covered in this domain; and the day to day activities will be documented on wordpress, as before. I love writing and nothing in this world is capable of keeping me away from it for too long.

Loads of love to you dear blog! You keep me alive in the best way possible! *hugs*

The Week That Was!

2011-06-13T15:55:00.000+05:30

Its been a week, since I have written here! And, this week has been incredible!

Want to know how??

Monday - Was Hats Off to all Mom's Everywhere!

Tuesday - Was the first in-house house warming party with only the 6 of us!

Wednesday - When the Guitar Hero came Home!!

Thursday - Kiss Me!!

Friday - Shaitan on the Day of release!

Saturday - Yummy South Indian Cuisine!!!

Sunday - Was the essence of Sex And the City!

Variety is the spice of life, ain't it?

So Much, So That!

2011-06-06T14:38:00.000+05:30

FYI - Day 9, Day 10 [I saw ShahRukh Khan], Day 11, Day 12, Day 13 and Day 14!!

I'm feeling terrible for ignoring this space!

But there's not much for me to write here. I have been saying all that I want to There! Is this what people feel when they cheat on their spouses?

Aah, Brainwave. I have been wanting to talk about something from the time I read about it, all those years ago.
This!

When two people, work together, they tend to spend more time together, than their own spouses. They go through highs and lows together, and come to a stage where, the understanding they have with each other is what they desired to have in an ideal relationship. Is this considered cheating? I think not. Thats just pure work Chemistry. Right? It is not cheating as long as its platonic? But when you share feelings with someone, and that someone is not your better half, isn't that cheating? Consider the rest as fiction!

Is a relationship only based on the physical relationship people tend to share? I had read it, back in college, when the George W. Bush controversy happened, and it intrigued me. Then years later, I joined work. When I moved to a different city, different office, I saw the phenomenon. Office colleagues, who were over-dependent on each other. I used to think, that, sometimes its ok in office, to have good friends, right? I have friends, and the we greet each other with a side hug in office! But what I saw, was different.

They were possessive about each other. They didn't like it if a third person was talking, in the absence of the other. More with the unmarried girl, than the married man. What was it between them? I don't consider having a Office Spouse as infidelity. So, initially, I was extremely normal. But time, aggravated it. I saw things, I didn't want to see. And, people around were talking about them. How could they not know?

I still don't have answers to my query. I'm not sure I even want Answers!! So much, so that - it gives me jitters!

Well, all's well that end's well. I wish not to go down memory lane, for more such Incidents.

When you write everyday!

2011-05-31T12:31:00.000+05:30

From the time I have started writing, there have been times when I simply don't have anything to say. There have been times, when I haven't posted anything for months together. So, when I took up the challenge of writing everyday, I knew it was going to be difficult, but I didn't imagine to be this difficult.

The positive about this, is, that everyday, however it is, I try a little bit harder to make it better, coz I know I have to write about it. So, if I'm low, I cheer myself up! If I've had a considerably boring day, I try and make it productive or good, just because I have to write about it.

Why can't I do this everyday? Regardless of whether I'm writing or not? It feels good, when you go to sleep with a smile. I can say this, because, it has been only 8 days, and there have been many things that have upset me or made me feel low. In a normal scenario, I would have stayed upset, and gotten more frustrated over time. [Well, yeah! it happens sometimes, doesn't it?] But not this time. This time, I decided to only see positives in every situation, and keep me up and charged for the next day!

Writing on wordpress, is completely different compared to blogger, and initially, I wasn't liking it much, but it has sort of grown on me. Blogger is still my first love! ;)

Just in case you missed, here is Day 5, Day 6, Day 7 & Day 8!

Love,

Day 3 and Day 4!!

2011-05-27T17:14:00.000+05:30

Life, as they say, is like ice-cream! Enjoy it, before it melts.

Thats what I'm trying to do these days. The positivity around me fills me with so much love.

I feel like, I have to keep this one alive. Coz, I love this blog, a lot. So, Here goes!

My 250 days till I turn 25 Project!

My Day in Office and My Day with friends and lots more!!

Day 2!

2011-05-25T13:11:00.000+05:30

I love this space too much, to not update my DAY 2 here!!

Sigh! For the sheer love of blogging - here goes!

http://wordsasafomoflife.wordpress.com/

Day 1!!

2011-05-23T17:46:00.000+05:30

There it is! My first Day! 250 more to go, till I turn 25! OMG 25!!!

*Shrieks*

For Your Eyes Only : - DAY 1

Moving!

2011-05-18T16:06:00.002+05:30

Well, the day is finally nearing, the day I start my daily rambling my activities everyday, for 250 days!

Lets see, if any growing up happens. And since blogger doesn't have a password protect option I am considering wordpress or tumblr. Anyone have any suggestions?

When I started this post, I was talking about moving houses. You have heard about moving from one place to another in my old posts - here, here and here. Lo and behold. I will be moving houses again! So, this time, I'll be moving houses as well as blog address. This one will always be the primary one. And the one closer to my heart.

one of my favorite pictures - courtesy me!

UPDATE: I have decided on WordPress! :) :) So, If needed, my 250 to 25 Day Project will be showcased here : My WordPress World!!

What Am I Passionate About??

2011-05-06T00:17:00.001+05:30

All the gaga I did, about being passionate in my last post. [If u haven't read it, read it here.] Made me wonder, and now, am forced to wonder [thanks to Daddy dearest] what am I really passionate about?

First, what is the difference between Passion and Desire? They don't mean the same thing. [Obviously]

Desire: Interested in doing something, but will do it or continue doing it only if convenient.

Passion: Interested in doing something, and will do it No matter what.

Now that we've cleared that, I'll make a list of things I desire first. [We'll try and figure out, by the end of this blog, what I am really passionate about ]

To become a Choreographer: I love to dance. I have been teaching dance for school and stuff since school. No, I haven't been trained in any particular dance art form other than Bharatanatyam; but I still dream about being a Choreographer one day.

Why haven't I become one yet?

I still choreograph these days, but for weddings only, and that too close friends and relatives. I don't dance on a regular basis. [I know I should :( ]
I want to learn other forms of dance professionally, and not just by watching shows like Dance India Dance, Jhalak Dikhla Ja or So You think You can Dance.

To get into Media/ Televison: I have wanted to work for a media house from the longest time. If I got work in UTV or BBC or MTV, I'd do anything.

Why haven't I joined one yet?

Places like this needs contacts, and I don't know if I can use the ones I have.
I don't know, if my dad would approve of me working here, if the work is not good enough.
I'm slightly prone to distraction, and the image you have about people in media, is a little distraction can cause a lot of damage.

To prepare well for GMAT: Now this definitely has nothing to do with me being lazy. This is something I am going to do. But, that constant nagging in the head which needs me to justify why I want to do my MBA, is extremely critical.

Ok, by now, I should have figured out what I am passionate about. I still don't know. Currently I'm very very passionate about this blog, and don't want to stop writing here.

Reading my past couple of posts, and after doing some self introspection, I think, I'm passionate about people around me. And this has made me over do the relationship - friends, love, relatives everyone, I tend to do extra. And then, with more people than not, I realize that, I'm just another person in their lives, and not someone special, and because you have always done extra, they stop valuing it and start expecting more. Human psychology is like that, I'm guessing, not that I know loads about it.

I have had experiences in the past, which keep me fairly detached these days. Atleast with new people. Even if I'm hurt/ I'm sad/ angry, I have learnt to mask it and move on. Not a good feeling, but its better than feeling bad for a long time, no?

So, What am I passionate about?? I think I still have to figure that out. Can I chose, what to be passionate about? I think I can, And thats what I am going to do! :D :D :D

Have I mentioned, I have the most awesome dad! He asks me to figure out what i am passionate about, so that I can pursue it.. Then he inspires me to make the right choice.. based on pros n cons.. and then.. 10 mins later, he calls just to tell me, that he loves me loads, and it'll remain the same whatever I chose to do in life!! I don't know why, but I think I wanted to listen to that, today! Thanks Na! You're the best!

Image From weheartit.com

I AM [ Friendships II ]

2011-05-04T02:47:00.002+05:30

p.s: for those who are into cooking, or would want to try fun ways of getting new recipes check this site..!! and give them some love by commenting in their comment box: Lets get cooking!!

Baangur is still playing on repeat in my music player; but youtube has me hooked on to this:

There is a unreleased movie, one of Anurag Kashyap's first. Paanch. I have nice friends who downloaded the movie. Its only a Preview Copy that is available. Its a cult movie of sorts. Kay Kay Menon as Luke Morrison is one of the best performances I have seen. I don't want to sound like I'm giving a movie review, but I sort of really like Anurag Kashyap Films! :)

I just came across passionforcinema.com and saw, the man himself commenting, and being a part of it; I wanted to join it immediately. I heard its undergoing change in Admin and maybe, just maybe, Anurag Kashyap might buy it! woohoo!!

I have met very few people in my life who are truly passionate about something. Anything. One such person in this very very VERY dear friend of mine! He doesn't know this, yet, but he is like a life support system for me since the last two years. I sort of cannot think of life without him. Its totally weird with him. He's not like anybody else. There are times when I can just pick the phone, call him, and go on talking for the longest time.. and he wouldn't have said one single word. Suddenly, I stop, check the phone if the conversation is still on, and say Hello, u there na? And he'll be like.. haan meri ma, aage bol! [yes mother, go on..] And there are these times when I don't know what to tell him. I'll pick the phone to call his number, and before it rings, will cut the call, because I'll run the probable conversation we'll be having in my head, figure out he's either going to disagree or shout at me, and its better if I don't talk to him!

Its not the conventional friendship people seem to share; he's a person, I met through work, and hence we have so much of work to discuss, but more than that, we, I, we talk about movies and songs and the like. He actually talks way too less, compared to any other friend I have; he just expects us[his friends] to understand what he wants to say! He talks way too less, and initially it was disturbing. I used to get irritated when I would go on and on about this friend of mine did this and that relative of mine did that, and I wouldn't know a single thing about him/his people. Slowly, I started "getting" him rather getting to know him. So,Whenever he talks, I listen, and with all my attention, coz he's saying what he's saying coz its important to him, else he wouldn't have said it!

When I was in Mumbai, he was the one I was with most of the time(other than at work) [ One of the two GUYS I spoke about then]. Movies, Movies, Lunches, Dinners, Pizza, Movies, Beer, Whiskey, Movies, Wine, Vodka, Movies, WWE, Cricket, Windows Movie maker, Movies. Did I mention Movies? Well thats what we did! I probably have had the most fights with him! I don't know if we can call them fights, but I would be constantly doing something wrong and he would get angry. And for those times ~~when~~ , if , he did something wrong, I wasn't allowed to get angry. :P Actually I don't get angry that much, so it was alrite!

[I'm re-writing this post, as the earlier one got deleted when my system crashed, but last time I wrote a lot of different things, this time, like always, this page is making me type things, I didn't set out to say!! but hey, I said it! My blog, no? ;)]

I started off, by talking about passion, when I was introducing him. Once he knows he has to do something, he will. No Matter What!

Be it fitness, work, music, WWE, cricket. I don't think he does anything half heartedly. Thats why when he does something, I have learnt to automatically know, that its important to him[and hence, somehow, becomes sort of important to me]. If it wasn't he wouldn't be doing it!

I have soooo much to say about him, but somehow, this space is not enough. No space is. I wanted to write about, how I became friends with him, how the journey was, how I have made a fool of myself, umpteen number of times, when I'm with him, how I get upset when he "supposedly" is only pulling my leg and not meaning whatever he said seriously, how he's the only one who calls me "sadu"[grumpy] even though I'm not to the rest of the world and so many other things. But I'm keeping them for later. I guess.

I cannot not mention this another friend when I talk about him. She completes us. Sort of. We are actually four of us, in this close knit group of ours. But off-late its been just the three of us. She is going to be my new roommate! and I'm super psyched about it!! I'll talk about her in a post of her own. Most probably. :P No, I will. But for now, this Image, of the three of us!

was meant to be Raavan with 9 heads! :P

I wrote this as a Testimonial [on orkut, when writing a testimonial on it, meant so much ] to him about almost 2 years ago, and most of it, still holds good!

I have no idea why I'm doing this.. but i wanted to.. so here it is!!

I have known him only from the last six months.. and to be honest I don't know him at all... but still.. he makes me want to try harder!! ;-)if i haven't made enough sense i'm sorry.. A---- is a person very dear to my heart.. someone who made my journey into the corporate world more interesting..[if i may say so ] he taught me loads of tiny things.. which i needed to learn.. so he's my god of small things(too much hogaya kya??)I can safely say that he's one of a kind.. very genuine.. and extremely correct!! he can make u laugh.. n he can make u cry.. n he can also make u do both at the same time!!! A----, You are one of the best ppl I've met in life.. n i feel very privileged to know you..Thanks sweetie.. for everything.. muaah!!

I AM [ Friendships ]

2011-04-22T01:50:00.001+05:30

I have spoken a lot about my friends. I am just going to continue doing that.

Before that, Sharing this song. Listening to it on repeat and loving it more, each time I listen to it!

p.s: Anurag Kashyap is gonna be acting in this. I AM all excited, are you? :)

I am in Bangalore for a friend's wedding. And this time, I actually had the time to catch up with most of the people I wanted to meet. Life changes so much, doesn't it? Its only been three years since we finished college in 2008. Most of them are getting married. Girls and Boys alike. Now, my parents are also concerned worried and behind my life regarding the whole marriage fiasco. I have stalled them for 3 years from now. But, my mom is relentless! :) :) I love her to bits! But there's only so much I can take.

The whole thing about its the right time to get married and all of that. Who really knows whats the right time, and whats not? Shouldn't marriage happen when two people who want to spend the rest of their lives together decide to legalize their relationship? I have nothing against marriages where the parents decide and the children agree. All I'm asking is, why it is like that? A simple explanation would be more than sufficient. :)

Friends.

Last night, after attending my friend's reception, I had the most amazing time with one friend who is the only one I can talk talk to. The fact that I am that honest with him, is crazy. Not that I lie to my other friends, :p but I can think aloud with him, and more often than not, he'll know exactly what I meant to say. Phases, our friendship went through, looking back at them today, I felt it was necessary. Not all of it, but yes most of it.

I made my share of mistakes. When, Harry Potter and The Half Blood Price was out, people around me, [mean mean ppl that they were] told me the suspense - that Dumbledore dies in the end. Now, this friend and I used to discuss the series, book by book. So, when he called and mentioned the half blood prince; assuming he was also going to tell me about Dumbledore's death, I like a kid complaining to its mom, said, ya ya, I know Dumbledore dies at the end, Snape kills him. He cut the call on me. I call him back and he doesn't pick for around half an hour, and then finally picks the phone and shouts at me for telling him the suspense. I try and explain why I did what I did, but no, he was furious, and rightfully so. I also was furious at the people who had told it to me; but my reaction wasn't even one tenth of his. That's how serious he was about Harry Potter! He had been angry with me in the past but nothing came close to this one. I immediately went to his place, with chocolates and I don't know what else; just so that he calms down and his anger subsides. I couldn't stand the thought of him being angry with me for even one day!

Cut to - Sometime last year, it had been aages since we had spoken to each other, and when I did, it was messed up. The tone wasn't right, the feeling wasn't right. I asked what was wrong, and he didn't tell me. I asked a couple more times, and after insisting a little more, he actually said, if I have to spell out what is wrong, I have nothing to say to you. It shattered me in a very different unexpected way. I really didn't know what was wrong. And what was even worse (according to me,) was I didn't do anything Immediately to rectify whatever it was that had gone wrong. I took help from time! Why I reacted the way I did, I'll never know. I think its the person I have become. Or. Maybe I didn't have the strength in me to fix it immediately with multiple things going on in life.

Forever and Always!

All is well now! and I hope it remains this way forever and always coz' there's noone like him in my life. Weird and strange as it is, I love what we share and I wanted to share this here. It'll never be the same again, and it won't be much different in the future. What I love the most, is I can always pick it up from exactly where I left it. And its mutual. [I hope]. He is a major factor in who I AM today. Also, a major factor in who I AM with today [ coz I stuck to advice given by him aages ago, and am not moving on to listening to the new advice - which he'll give me(as promised) even if I don't comply - (I do listen and consider, promise.) to them ]

Thank You, for being there! For being who you are!

p.s: I could have spoken about thousand other things about us, have no clue why I chose to talk about this! Its just something about this blog, makes me keep typing things I hadn't thought of in the longest time!

Let the Writing, Begin!

2011-04-13T17:43:00.000+05:30

I have something exciting to say!!

After having nothing to say for the last so many days, I have decided to start writing everyday.

Inspired by Shilpa VK who is currently chronicling 1000 days before turning 30; I will be doing the 250 days till I turn 25!!

Shilpa, is not just a fellow blogger. She is a Brand Manager in P&G. She is the Director & Co-Producer of a Indie Movie based out of Singapore - Mausams. It was screened in Singapore from 1st April to 11th April, and got rave reviews from everyone who got to see it.

Poster Of Mausams - via movie website

Wish I could see it! I will, I am hoping, in the near future.

I know, its been really long since I blogged about anything. I was just going through a personal silence. There was soo much going on, that I didn't know what I could say, what I couldn't.

But now, that I have decided to Chronicle my days, till my 25th birthday, I am hoping things in the head will settle down and soon. :) :)

SO, the 250 days will Start on 23rd of May. So till then, there'll be preparations, and plots as to what I'll be talking about.

O, and yes, INDIA won the WORLD CUP!! WOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!! It was sooo sooo soooo amazing. Both the semi-finals and the finals!!! I actually saw people on the streets till 3-4 in the morning rejoicing. Hugging perfect strangers, hooting, shouting, singing, dancing in the streets.

I am so glad, I got to experience what I did! :) :)

Writing feels amazing, doesn't it??? :)

Delhi Diaries Part V - Turning 30!

2011-02-28T13:50:00.000+05:30

This is a Incomplete post. I started Writing this just after I saw the movie, Turning 30! and at that time, there were a million things running in my head. So much has happened since. I have tried re-writing this post several times, but haven't been able to do any justice at all! So, I decided to leave it incomplete.

NO! I ain't turning 30! As a matter of fact I will turn 24 next week!! And, it is scary! I still feel 21! 24 seems like such a big number for it to be associated with Age!

First things First, I saw this movie - Turning 30! Its a story about a Girl turning 30[duhhh] and the crisis she faces in her life; when her boyfriend of 2 years breaks up with her to get married to a younger girl, and the people at her work place are giving her a hard time. But other than these two things, she seems to have a wonderful life. Amazing friends, an old flame who is still deeply in love with her.

The movie had loads of swearing, and crying and more of crying, but I kind of liked the movie, most importantly because, it was shot in Mumbai! In the movie, she keeps writing about her different stations in life, and that she later re-writes as her book. Thats when she realizes her true calling in Life and Love!

Delhi Diaries IV - December

2010-12-30T04:11:00.000+05:30

Remember, last December when I was in Delhi? No? Well read here!! :)

Sooo many things happened completely unplanned last December! This year, its been quite different. There were many things planned; but none of them materialized. :( . Its the strangest thing. You so badly want for something to happen, and all of a sudden, that power to want is taken from you. I have been a mess of sorts the last couple of weeks, and hoped that the year would end on a better note.

That clearly does not seem possible too.

What good has come of it? Life has given me a sort of filter; where in I get to know the people around me. The ones who are in my life - for a reason, season or a lifetime. Its an eye opener of sorts; and I think I needed one!

Who am I to complain? the week before these two weeks have been fab! I've had loads n loads of fun!! The fun actually started one night, when I was sitting and talking to friends, about love, life, work, studies, relationships, philosophies and other like subjects.. It was a long conversation, and in that conversation One of my friends said something that stayed back with me.

He said (i don't remember the exact words, but) "Friends we make and decide to keep, are of our choice. We do not have a obligation to be nice to the whole world, just because man is a social being" or something which meant the same.

The discussion we were having, started basically between differences between people of North India and South India. [ and as usual, I was the sole representative of the South!] The conversation revolved around, how, people in North India have a disagreement, or a argument( which they do ever so often :P) and keep their stand, till one of them emerges the winner. Down South, when people have these kind of differences, and end up arguing, more often than not, they let go, and are back to being normal. So if someone is rude today, and he/she comes n talks to u normally tomorrow, the sensibility will be in talking back normally, like nothing ever happened. But up here, if someone is rude to you today, and comes and talks normally the next day, you become rude, and keep it that way. Until, there is an intervention of other people, mostly friends, who TRY n sort things out, or force them to let go, OR some miracle happens.

I think thats why, People up north are said to be more aggressive than the people down south; who are more sensible. I relate to the southern patterns more, coz, thats where I have been most of my life. I am nice to everybody. Even those people who I might have fought with. Even those people who have said really mean things about me. I cry at night, tell a few friends about it; but end of it, was back to normal with whoever it was who said whatever.

I don't know if this model works everywhere. Coz it sure as hell does not work here. Being nice is seen as a weakness, and people take advantage of it!! Is it really true, that you have to be mean in today's world to get your job done? Do nice people really come last? I'm scared. Very Very Scared. I haven't been this scared of even my dad!!!

I thought, and then thought some more, as to why I am still friends with those people? Why am I still compelling myself to be in amicable terms with everyone in life? The answer, my dear friends is, I don't know any other way.

Its true. I don't like something in someone. I cannot go and tell that someone to stop doing what he/she is doing. Until and Unless I am really really close to that someone. And even then, I sometimes fear, if I'll lose the closeness, if I say something. But thats the real test, isn't it? SO for me to survive in this world, I am supposed to develop a little shrewdness, a little rude behavior, and a don't care attitude. Will I be able to pull that off?

They say, Christmas is the season to be jolly, fra la la la la, la la la la..for me, its been anything but!

But - like they say, Jo bhi hota hai, acche ke liye hota hai! (whatever happens, happens for good) I am just waiting and watching what good comes out of my situation.

There's so much more I want to write about, but its 4:05 a.m and I really really need to sleep!

A picture for sore eyes. I love it; hope u do too!!

Delhi Diaries Part III - Dreams

2010-12-09T23:39:00.000+05:30

How important is a dream? How far would you go to make your dream come true?

If you can dream–and not make dreams your master,

If you can think–and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

Like Rudyard Kipling's poem, If I can dream, and not make dreams my master, I still want to make them come true, How would that be possible?

"Mehnat" [Hard-work] is something which I am unable to keep going everyday. More often than not, there are distractions, with I very easily fall prey to. Focus. I lack focus. And today, I don't know how to get focus onto my life. Like I have mentioned here and here and here.

The base, somewhere, is that I am unable to keep myself happy for a set period of time. There always seems to be something or the other that creeps up and F*#@s with my head. The fact that I keep everyone and everything other than me, at a higher priority, I seem to be unable to achieve what I want. The minute, no, the second, I feel like I am keeping me higher than the other person, I feel completely selfish, and then do more than whats required, to make up to the person/situation which I might have not given a higher priority at first.

And every such thing obviously takes all my me time, and I am left with goals and deadlines which I try and make for myself get postponed indefinitely. I am not complaining, nor am I saying, I don't like to do what I do, When I give others my priority, these others are not people off the street, but they are people who are extremely extremely dear to me. My mom always says, I should learn to keep myself first, coz, somewhere over the years she has forgotten how to give that to herself.

Have I gotten it from her?

Or do I simply have a major inferiority complex?

I think it is the latter too, [if thats what u're thinking]. If its academics, or work, I know I can achieve it, come what may. If I have a deadline to meet, I will not sleep the entire night, to get it done. When it comes to studies, and I know I have to do it, I did. When I had a choice, I sometimes ended on the easier route. Procrastination - thats the word! I think I have been procrastinating certain things for so long, that it has become a part of life.

I have accepted the fact that, there are no shortcuts anymore.Still, Why? Why haven't I been able to focus, and achieve my dream.

At this juncture in life, I feel that all my dreams, all my ambitions, every single thing is dependent on this one dream. It might even cure me of my other problems. Then why? Have you seen True Blood? Season 1? In that a lady removes the demon from within a drunk lady. She doesn't really do anything, but it still works. Faith. Because of faith. Today, I am not only lacking Focus, I am also lacking Faith. I feel in a major major way like a loser in life.

And I hate it. I hate losing. I hate this feeling. Being at this place, makes it feel, like I have noone, NOone, noOne, who'll really listen to what I have to say, and that makes me lose my conviction, in my own speech. Confidence, which is such a major portion of me, seems to be slipping away too. And I am trying very heard to not let that go.

With this heavy heart, I just don't want to type anymore. Hopefully the next time I sit to write, there's more positivity in what I want to say.

Maybe the Delhi winters have dampened my spirits, in more ways than one! Life is to be lived and loved. It should be fun and frolic.

It. Will. Be.

Delhi Diaries Part II - Friendships!

2010-12-02T19:33:00.001+05:30

Friendships Change. Friends Don't. or is it the other way round?

I don't know and hence am confused.

Two people, sworn to be best friends forever. Move in to live together[Mistake #1]. Figure out, what can be better than having your best friend living with you full time. Life in the same city, but with different sets of people. New friends, New relations, New House, New everything. Time moves on, and living in the same house, makes two best friends drift apart.

You love your friend for all the fun and craziness they bring in your life, but you need structure and responsibility in a house-mate, right? Your home and all the responsibilities are left at home where your father and mother look after everything, you don't want a house-mate/friend telling you what is right and what is wrong, right?

People Change. People Adapt. People Adjust. People Should. Man is a social animal, isn't he? Thank goodness they weren't married to each other. Otherwise, there would be another tale of Divorce.

The two friends in some corner of their hearts still love each other (I think!) but situation has made it such that they cannot stand each others guts!

It makes me uncomfortable, coz I love both of them, and somehow, it looks like I have made a choice, between the two of them. I didn't mean to. When issues and matters were small, I tried reasoning things out. But when it was blown out of proportion, I didn't do anything, mainly because:

- I didn't want to make a choice.

- I assumed two grown-ups will know how to handle their own issues, without having a kid interfere.

- I - in my craziest dream - didn't imagine, that it'll last this long, and become this big!

Life, has taught me a great deal about friendships. And I want to list some of them here, to remind me someday incase I happen to forget:

1. Never Ever have money matters un-resolved between friends. It somehow brings its ugly face sooner or later to spoil any relationship.

2. Never forget birthdays. All those friends you made back when you were a kid, they don't know who you really are today, and honestly, they don't care. But they'll always remain special. Show them that.

3. Never EVER interfere in your friends relationships. Be friends with their better halves, but remember, ALWAYS - the person who introduced you to that person was your friend first. Let it stay that way.

4. When you meet friends of friends, do not at any point of time make your friend seem less important. If you're making any sort of plans, or you think your friendship with the new people seem increasing, Keep your friends in the loop.

5. Be honest with a friend. You don't like something, say it. And just because you said it, don't expect your friend to change for you. If he or she feels you are right, they will take necessary action.

6. Accept them for who they are. Never judge them. They are your friends for a reason.

7. You don't need to be friendly to those people who were friends once, but don't respect you anymore. When competition / jealousy take over a certain friendship, it hasn't been friendship for quite some time now. Let go.

8. Stay in touch. [ I am majorly lacking here - and I feel soo soo soooo terrible, for not being able to do it]

As and when, I remember my other lessons, I shall list it down here, in my small little world.

Now you maybe thinking, why the title of this post was Delhi Diaries?

Simply, I like the sound of it! :P :)

Writing this, felt totally Liberating! I hope things improve, and love shall prevail!!

Delhi Diaries Part I

2010-11-30T15:46:00.000+05:30

Its been long since I blogged, I know!! However, this time round, I ain't guilty! Why should I be? I love this space, and I have been visiting all the wonderful blogs around me, reading and seeing real awesome stuff. Thanks to Facebook! :D

I am addicted to it. Facebook that is, and I tried to stay away from it. I deleted my account [the temporary kind] and stayed without it for 20 whole days!!!! I *sheepishly* cheated. I had the id and password of a friend. SO I logged in to Facebook through his account and stalked all the mutual friends we had! Considering I have more friends than him, it became difficult not being on FB and I joined right back!!

Addiction is another thing, I don't believe in. How can anyone get addicted to anything? So, me being me, tried to figure out, what exactly was my relationship with Facebook. Why do I feel the need to be incessantly logged into it? It used to be Sorority Life, once upon a time. Today it isn't so.

I think that the fact that I live away from home, which means I have not only left behind family, but also loads of my friends behind, leads to me having a certain kind of craving, to know everything, Coz I feel I am missing out on so much!! And Now that I have moved to the Capital [ of India] (Yes!! For all you people who didn't know yet, I have moved to DELHI!!! :D , ok back to rambling... :P ) I not only have my friends from Bangalore who I miss so much, I also have my friends from Mumbai( o, how much I love thee!) who I miss loads n loads. So staying in touch becomes necessary, don't you think? :)

And hence the strange addiction to Facebook! * i ain't sure if it is true, but doesn't it give a logical reason for my obsession??*

Its been almost three months since I moved to Delhi. Well, Noida, to be precise. [ok, a quickie, How many of you knew NOIDA was short for New Okhla Industrial Development Area?? ] My reason for choosing NOIDA, is something, I am not going to elaborate right now, but I kinda like this place. A. Lot.

Thank god for the wonderful family I had back in Mumbai, I had a support system which I didn't realize was so strong till I moved to this place. Here I do not have family, but I have a few friends and special people, who make me feel part of home. Three months here have been craaazy and I can't wait to see what the future holds for me.

I found a wonderful place to live, thanks to Sulekha.com :). Its like the house I have always wanted, well almost. Its a lovely duplex three bedroom apartment and two wonderful flat mates. Yes! I have a bedroom all to myself. Remember the fab house I found in Mumbai?? In that House we were 4, yes FOUR girls living in a single bedroom house. I loved that house too, but you see, coming from there, how very fantastic my new house sounds? :) Yeah, it is.

I started this blog, when I moved to Mumbai. To write about my feelings, experiences and life in general. Slowly, I found I was writing because I wanted to be read, I started having loads of followers, and what I wrote, when I wrote it, and how I wrote it all things started revolving around people who are reading it. I somewhere stopped writing for me, to vent out my feelings, my emotions. Thats the reason, I didn't blog for so long. I love reading other blogs, and I love it more when people read my ramblings. I just wanted to write for another reason.

More soon. I promise! :) *hugs*

10 9 8 7 6 5.... U know what I'm talking about, don't you?

2010-08-03T16:17:00.001+05:30

Dear Me-Era tagged me to do this! And As I looked around this world... I saw lots n lots of people have done this tag!

So, If you haven't done this already and You like what you read - Then you are tagged!!! :D :D :D

TEN HOW'S:

First Thing that came to my head when I saw 10 How's!! HIMYM :):)

1. How did you get one of your scars?

Bike Skid on Mom's Birthday! [ I had the cake with me, half of it got squished! :( ]

2. How did you celebrate your last birthday?

With Friends n Loved ones @Red Box n then By Marine Drive! [my most favorite place in Mumbai!!]

3. How are you feeling at this moment?

Not Happy!

4. How did your night go last night?

Saw a Movie [Once Upon a Time in Mumbai - 2.5 stars] and then cosied up reading a M&B after aaages!

5. How did you do in high school?

Well enough! [ My dad would say, I was consistently mediocre :P]

6. How did you get the shirt you’re wearing?

Ha! I am not wearing a Shirt! ;-)

7. How often do you see your best friend(s)?

I stopped believing in having "best friends" ages ago. I try and see my close friends a couple of times per year. Distance. What it does to people.

8. How much money did you spend last month?

Loads!! :( More than how much I make!! :( well it was a month filled with birthdays and sudden plans!

9. How old do you want to be when you get married?

26-28 is what my age should be when I get married. Old, I never will be! :P

10. How old will you be at your next birthday?

Like I said, I don't grow old! :P

NINE WHAT'S:

1. Your mothers name?

And thats got to do with this tag, how?

2. What did you do last weekend?

I saw a movie. I saw a Play. And. I went to a beautiful Valley.

3. What is the most important part of your life?

An Illusion which will be converted to Reality.

4. What would you rather be doing?

Dancing! :-)

5. What did you last cry over?

A friend. I want him to call n talk to me! :'(

6. What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?

I Cry. It doesn't make me feel better, but it helps by not making me feel worse.

7. What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?

Unconditional Love - Both Ways! :D

8. What are you worried about?

If I'll ever make my daddy happy!

9. What did you have for breakfast?

Poha.

EIGHT YOU'S:

1. Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend?

*sheepishly* Yes.

2. Have you ever had your heartbroken?

My heart is very delicate like that. Breaks. Easily.

3. Have you ever been out of the country?

Not Yet. :)

4. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?

Yes, Many Times. [ Trusted the wrong People ]

5. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend?

Yes.

6. Have you ever had sex on the beach?

Yes, And I happen to like that Particular Drink! :)

7. Have you ever dated someone younger than you?

No. I find Older People more attractive. [ Aquarian trait, can't help. :P ]

8. Have you ever read an entire book in one day?

Loads of them. The best being Angel Falls by Kristen Hannah.

SEVEN WHO'S:

1. Who was the last person you saw?

I am in Office. Lots of People. In particular - My Saviour in this big bad world. My friend in Office who just entered all drenched!!

2. Who was the last person you texted?

Does texting someone on BBM count? ;) Ans: My baby boy!

3. Who was the last person you hung out with?

Aunt n Uncle. Last Night. Movie.

4. Who was the last person to call you?

The CIO of A big company ( can't name which - confidentiality clause - client )

5. Who did you last hug?

Friend.

6. Who is the last person who texted you?

Same Person Who I last Texted!

7. Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?

Same Answer As Above! *blush*

SIX WHERE'S:

1. Where does your best friend(s) live?

*cheesy?* in my Heart!! <3 <3 :P

2. Where did you last go?

To the beautiful Valley this weekend!

3. Where did you last hang out?

Cafe Coffee Day [in Office]

4. Where do you go to school?

One School - 15 Years. Bangalore! :D

5. Where is your favorite place to be?

In the complany of People I love!! :)

6. Where did you sleep last night?

*shock* How did u know?? :P Daya Bhavan, Matunga! :D

FIVE DO'S:

1. Do you think anyone likes you?

I hope so. I am likeable like that.

2. Do you ever wish you were someone else?

Sometimes. An Altered Version of Myself.

3. Do you know the muffin man?

Ofcourse I know him. He always puts an extra bit of chocolate sauce on my Muffin!! *grin*

4. Does the future scare you?

No, Should it?

5. Do your parents know about your blog?

I think they do. I don't know if they read it. [ *shrieks* OMG! ]

FOUR WHY'S:

1. Why are you best friends with your best friend?

Same reason why I dont' believe in "best friends" anymore!!

2. Why did you get into Blogging?

To have an outlet of thoughts. To want to make myself heard.

3. Why did your parents give you the name you have?

My Dad Liked this name.

4. Why are you doing this survey?

Why shouldn't I? :P

THREE IF'S:

1. If you could have one super power what would it be?

Shape Shiifting!

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?

Yes.

3. If you were stranded on a deserted island and could bring 1 thing, what would you bring?

Nothing. [ btw, isn't this a what question too?? ]

TWO WOULD YOU EVER'S:

1. Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you?

Been there, Done that.

2. Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love?

Yes. If I love someone, I'd do anything.

One last question:

1. Are you happy with your life right now?

I don't know. I want to be. I will be. Just.Not.Right.Now.

All images from weheartit !! I hope I did Justice to this tag!! :) :) My next post would hopefully be a me post, as I have done Oh-So-Many tags.. ;-)!!

Happy August!

Luv,

I'm Not a Girl... Not yet a Woman!

2010-07-29T17:25:00.001+05:30

I used to think

I had the answers to everything,

But now I know

Life doesn't always go my way, yeah...

Feels like I'm caught in the middle

That's when I realize...

I'm not a girl,

There is no need to protect me.

It's time that I

Learn to face up to this on my own.

I've seen so much more than you know now,

So don't tell me to shut my eyes.

I'm not a girl,

Not yet a woman.

All I need is time,

A moment that is mine,

While I'm in between....

This is the first thing that came to my mind when Sammy From her "Aura of Sleepless Dreams" tagged me! This Britney Spears Song which I used to listen to when I was in High-School and Pre-Univ, was something I could relate to. A lot.

Now, the Tag. I am supposed to list "MY SINS AGAINST THE GENDER STEREOTYPE"

And you must tag twelve blogging friends or else you will be cursed to wear blue ~~clothes~~ pants if you are a woman and pink shirts if you are a man – for next twelve years

Is what the Indian Homemaker ( who started this tag ) says!!

So here I am, telling you about the Not So Womanly Me!

** From Childhood, I have Always been the "bahadur baccha" at home.
Climbing, breaking, discovering, MAN-handling things. Always. There was a time, when anything, ANYthing, at home would get spoilt, dad would always ALways catch me for it!

me with my daddy strongest!

**This story is what my mom keeps telling me. to. date. When I was born, one of my mom's friend saw me, and said "Bhagwan ke paas, thodi mitti kam hogayi. Yeh toh tera beta hai, beti nahi"

(it is said that god creates us with divine sand and sends us to our parents or something like that. So.. the line above translated to English is: God fell short of some sand. Coz I was supposed to be mom's son, but became her daughter. ) Whenever I did any of the mischief mentioned in the earlier point, and when I did other things like a boy - Mom always tells and retells everyone around this story!

** I had only 1 barbie doll as a kid. I had He-Man, Super-Man, Poochie and Jimmy(my dog -soft toys) and trolls. I never played with my Kitchen set either. I preferred the Mechanics game(with nuts and bolts) and cars better.

well, this is a girly girl little me!! ;)

** In school, I always had short hair. SO in all the dances ( well, most of the dances ) the teachers always made me a boy! And I loved being a boy. The steps used to be better, and the costumes were less complicated! ;) This went on till Class 8. Then, in Class 9, it was a all girls dance and I had to wear a saree and dance. // Well Class 10 was when I "officially" choreographed my first dance with a dear friend. Thats when I realized how much I love back stage, than on stage. And in that dance, I found teaching the boys and doing Boy steps were coming to me much more easily than dancing with the girls. But I love all of them to bits.//

** When In Class 7, the seating arrangement for us kids in school was 3 Rows, with 5 benches each row, and 4 kids per bench. Our teacher had made us sit in such a manner that the first row and the third row were only boys and the row in between was where us girls were made to sit. Many things happened, and a very mischievous boy was made to sit with the girls. And when Ma'am had to pick one girl who had to sit in an all boys row.. she picked "ME" That was when, I think I became 'One of the guys'

** The incident above let me be so involved with the boys, that things which weren't decent for girls to talk or joke about was something I did on a regular basis. So, when kids talk about the dirty jokes, or topics pertaining to that, they were considered corrupt! I was the proud Miss Corrupt back then. And since then, I have always been more with guys than Girls.. *wherever the dirt was involved*

** A Play of which I was a part of when in Class 11, or 1st year pre-university college, I was the all responsible assistant manager. Here was one of those few important places in life where I did work back-stage and on-stage. How was this my not so girly thing I did? In the play, my character was of a Man! I had to wear Dhothi, and big, really big mustache. It was a state level competition, and we came first!! :D

** I wanted to learn how to ride a bike. And. I. Did. How "manly" / "boyish" is that?? :P

** I hate all kind of make up. Except of-course my ever loyal kajal/ eye liner. Everything else is too girly for me!

No make up! Only Eyeliner - That too on a major family function!

** I just cannot get myself to apply the regular moisturizer, sun-screen, or anything for the skin to glow n all the ooh la la. I cannot wash my face with facewash and hands with a handwash. Soap is soap. I love all my girlfriends who apply the lotion/cream before sleeping, after getting up, after bath and the gazillion times they use vaseline. I just can not!

** I love scotch. whiskey. and the like. Vodka, Gin, Breezer or Beer are not my kind of drinks. Even cocktails, I only order them when I have no other choice.

60 ml Teacher's :D :D

** I hate gold. I don't know if this qualifies. I love silver though. And Diamonds are my best friend. But I hate Gold. So, every time, mom suggests we buy gold [typical Indian mentality - old enough for marriage, stock up the gold] I ask her to buy them for herself, and ask them for cold hard cash instead! *evil grin* It doesn't work. :-(. I neither get gold nor cash!

I am unable to think of more content for this tag. Even though I've been one of the guys, I am a girl where I need to be, and who I need to be with. I asked a dear friend, to suggest, some more characteristics of me, and both us ended up talking about all the girly ones rather than the not so girly ones. So, I better stop here.

Hope this suffices, and hopefully qualifies as my sins against the gender stereotype.

I stole the Logo from Sammy!! :D Ok, Now, the tough part. I don't know who to tag this tag to!

So... I tag all people who read it, and want to take it up!! See, I am so good!! ;) Well, do take it up, boys n girls. It' was a fun activity for me, will be for you too!! :D

Nothing in Particular

2010-07-25T13:14:00.000+05:30

I have been reading so many posts about people and their lives. Being a part of this world makes me feel like I belong somewhere. Its just the weirdest thing.

When I moved to Mumbai, I was this very different person. I was coming from a different place in life and moving here I thought was the best decision I've ever made. At that time, it was. I was super enthusiastic about everything around me. New place, new life, new freedom - all those things that I wanted.

I come from a very close knit family. I consider myself very close to my parents and my brother. I have always been. They used to be such an integral part of me, that there was a time when I used to think, I couldn't do anything without them. Moving here, I slowly realized that I could do everything without them.

In time, I started calling them less, and telling them lesser. (The fact that I started talking less in-general is a different issue altogether.) I began keeping things to myself. Stopped sharing thoughts and feelings with friends. Stopped having friends. Stopped letting anyone come close enough to me which could cause me the slightest pain. Even when I kept next to zero expectations from someone I thought was a friend, I was almost always disappointed, and the pain that I tried so hard not to reach me, it did.

So, I hardened myself further. All this, without realizing that it was really happening to me. Today, When I'm in a crowd of people, I don't have much to talk. I feel at a loss of words, or less informed at times. I used to be this person who could strike up any conversation with anyone. Today, I can't.

What I am trying to communicate here, is that, I feel like I don't belong in the real world anymore. I don't feel wanted /needed anymore. And hence, consider this blog world, very close to my heart. I read posts all day long. I find so many similarities in people all around the world. I get to read about accomplishments, failures, kids, husbands, work, music and many many more things. And it feels wonderful.

It also sort of highlights the lack of anything exciting happening in my life.

Like the heading of this post suggests, this post is nothing in particular. I just had to vent my feelings somewhere and my poor sweet baby blog had to take the brunt of it.

WISH

2010-07-10T01:55:00.007+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 12; the twelfth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

I have been FAT, for a very long time now!

I have tried many many many ways of losing the extra weight. What I lack?

Focus.

As I have mentioned, In some of my previous posts, I have been unnecessarily procrastinating this activity.

The problem is, I have done everything I could, but since I don't see quick results, or results of How I want things to be,I lose the interest, and all the hardwork goes downhill.

In this whole procedure, back of the mind there has always been a WISH. At every stage of life, there has been a wish related to weight loss. I don't know, if it is a fat person thing, or just me, but I very sheepishly want to put my list here. My list of my imaginations,or my wishes.

1. This one is the oldest - One Day I get up, go see the mirror, and all the Fat is *whoosh* gone!
[ Like one of those movies like - Big (Tom Hanks) or Thirteen going on 30 ]

2. This one is the same as the first one, but it always has different stories each time I wish for it - I get something magical, or I meet someone - a magician or a tarot card reader - who'll do some spell on me and *whoosh* the FAT is all gone!!

3. This one is sorta crazy - I am kidnapped by the human trafficking mafias of the world, and since FAT me is of no use to them, they make me starve, by making me unconscious for 6 months, and I get up 6 months later and *whoosh* the FAT is gone!!! :P [ and the scary part is now they get to use me! :( ]

4. This one - You decide - I am travelling in a local train in Mumbai, and it gets bombed. I almost die. But someone similar to me really dies. The cops mistake her for me, and declare me dead. Her family takes me away(I am all burnt, so they don't recognize) And every single time ( of my imagination ) they take me to a different exotic location. There they do a cosmetic surgery on me, and I retain my eyes and my smile and most of my face, but *whoosh* the FAT is all gone!!

5. This is a recurring one - I get some major disease and become very weak. The medicines I take give me energy ONLY by burning my FAT. So, by the time I'm well, *whoosh* the FAT is all gone!!

6. This one is more recurring - One a perfect day, i.e when it is not my birthday, or anyone else's in the near future, and I'm with family or friends. I have to cross the road to reach them. When I'm crossing, I get hit by a truck . The family ( I have to live, so someone I know has to be around in my imagination every single time ) rushes me to the hospital. The doctors operate on me. Once out of the operation theater, he says, "Thank god! she's alive, but thats only because of the FAT. It was holding her organs and bones together. Now, I have removed it all; and her body is perfect" and I get up after a week to see *whoosh* the FAT all gone!! - Why a day when no one's birthday is close by is because, I love celebrating Birthdays, and I can't think of being in a hospital on any of my friend or relative's birthday! :P

7. This is my favorite - Science creates a medicine that I take, and in a month or two, all the FAT is dissolved and out of my system and my skin remains intact and not loose and hanging. So basically A medicine which in a couple of months would make *whoosh* All the FAT gone!

8. My Recent Favorite, which was my status message on FB - I wish Mosquitoes sucked FAT and not blood and check the response I got!!

These are just bizzare wishes, and I don't intend any of them coming true. [ I don't mind the mosquitoes really]

As you can see, Not once have I mentioned, I wish I started waking up early or I'll work out regularly or that I wish I could give up on chocolates in that list.

But my crazy imagination has given up on me! And I have learned that there is no shortcut to success.

So My Real WISH is that I have the passion, determination and the focus, required for the weight loss, and in the right manner.

p.s. I am thinking of making a series for the blog which is like a journal with my experience with weight loss. what say people? Will i get some love and motivation from you guys?

Will my Wish of being A Fit girl come true??

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Bengaluru!!

2010-06-29T01:33:00.002+05:30

Back Home for a Week, And really busy with some prep..!!

I am hoping this month ends on a fabulous note, and the next month begins with an even better note!!

Loads of love.. Will come back to this space, once I'm back in Mumbai!!

A "3" tag and An Award!!

2010-06-22T13:22:00.002+05:30

I have been Tagged!!! By Vibhuti... A wonderful Blogger! Find the links to her Blog.. at the end of this Post!

Here's to all of you knowing me, a little better! ;-)

3 Famous Names of Mine

- Deeps

- Deepu

- Dippy Sauce!

3 Things that Scare Me

* Me

* My Thoughts

* Losing Everyone Around Me

3 Things which make me Smile

^ My Dad when he says "Have a Wonderful Day"

^ When we have long conversations without saying anything!

^ Comments On my Blog! [ stole this from u Vibhuti! ]

3 Things that I Love

# Dancing

# Freedom

# Being Able to Love

3 Things that I Hate

- Being Lied to by Important People

- Trust Being broken

- Office Politics

3 Things I don’t understand

# Sports - Rather why people have to obsessed with it!

# How someone can give up Chocolates?

# Why our Politician don't work on Actual progress of our country

3 Things I’m doing right now

* Waiting for the Weekend [ :P its monday today.. ;-) ]

* Writing this Post

* Working on a Cost case for work!

3 Things I can’t do

^ Drive - I know how, i seem to have forgotten

^ Cook vegetarian food

^ Stop Hoping That I'd become thin one day!!

3 Things I think you should listen to

- Your Dad

- What your heart says

- Nothing's Gonna Change my Love for you!!

3 Shows I watched as a Kid

@ Different Strokes

@ Hip Hip Hurray

@ Mahabharat

3 Things I want in a Relationship

^^ Love

^^ Trust

^^ Security

[Again, I'm stealing what Vibhuti's written because this is what i would have typed even if this place was blank!! ]

3 Things of the Opposite Sex that appeal to me

- Respect for Elders and Women

- The way they treat people

- The Hands ;-)

3 Favorite Fictitious Characters

* William Darcy [ Pride &; Prejudice ]

* Edward Cullen [ Yes, I am a Twilight Freak ]

* Gerry Kennedy [ P. S I Love You ]

3 of my Favorite Hobbies

-- Dancing

-- Watching Movies n Random Tv Shows on my Laptop!

-- Blogging [ Reading and Writing ]

3 Beverages I drink regularly

Water

Coffee

More Water!!

3 Things I like about myself

My Eyes

My Smile

The fact that I cannot hate somone, no matter what they've done to me! [ my friends and dear ones don't like this in me... but I sorta do! ]

3 Things I hate about myself

I cry when I'm angry and hence cannot do anything about the anger!

Me Being Overweight

The fact that I am unable to focus on the more important things in Life, at this moment in time.

3 Things I’m wearing right now

My butterfly earrings!!

My Ring ( mom dad's gift to meon my 21st Birthday! )

A Smile!! :D

2 Truths and a Lie:

I lie a Lot!

I don't miss Bangalore!

I am in love!

[Guess which one's which]

3 People I pass this TAG to

Divaa Divine - Americanising Desi

Nethra Anjanappa - Otoise Opinions

JanJan - Between Me & My Thoughts

And Now the AWARD!!!!

This Awesome Award was given to me.. by my Wonderful Blogger Friend - Janjan! Firstly I'd like to apologize for the delay in putting this up!! But It means soo much to me!! Thank You So much Dear Girl!

It is None other Than --- *drumroll* The Master of Karate & Friendship Award!!! :D :D

Now I'd really like to spread the love, and give this award to....:

Vibhuti from here and here [ For tagging me in this post and as a new dost - that actually rhymed.. ;-) ]

Smriti from here [ who doesn't know her?? She's one of the very few Bloggers I have known from before the blog world n Love her loads!! *hugs*]

Esther From here [ My friend from 20sb! Girl u rock! ]

Sara from here [ *hugs girl* ]

Ratz from here [ My FYBF Friend ]

& Sourav from Here!![ I think I had to give to him, for being a sooper friend ]

Hidden

2010-06-05T12:01:00.004+05:30

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 11; the eleventh edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Is it difficult to express your feelings?

Have you found the strange oppression in your throat when you are unable to say what you want to say?

How many times have you "Hidden" your feelings lately?

There was this boy. He intrigued me. Everything he did was fascinating. To me, he was my own superstar. His words, his thoughts, his movements, his eyes, everything about him was captivating. The way he danced, the way he his perfume lingered around, the way he could tell, I was lying by that one crooked look.

It became a necessity for me to see he got everything he wanted. And he wanted a lot. It was like I was always playing "impromptu treasure hunt" with him. He wanted some girl - I help him get her. He wanted someone to talk to - I listen. He wanted some help with his journals - I do it. He wanted anything - and I got it for him.

There were a million, no, a gazillion things happening around me at the time; but my mind wasn't entirely on any of those. It was on this boy. I thought I loved him. And by getting him everything he wanted - he could see that. I thought he could see that. I always, ALWAYS knew that he was way out of my league; I couldn't get him, no matter what.

Of the gazillion things happening around me, I also happened to meet this amazing boy who I actually fell in love with. It was simple, it was easy and it was the best thing to ever happen to me.Period. But in the back of my head I wasn't entirely happy because I had feelings - hidden feelings - for this other boy. I failed to see what I had with me because of him I didn't have. I started cursing my life as it was getting harder and harder to live with myself because I felt I was cheating me.

Not the boy who loved me, but me. I also knew these feelings could never come out of me. It was the biggest sin - in my head - for these feelings to come out in the open. I knew it would destroy lot of friendships and shaken most of our lives. It was an obsession; it was unhealthy. I was blinded by these hidden emotions. I was living in some imaginary world. I let go of everything I had. My friends, my family, the boy who loved me and almost myself.

I knew I had to grow out of this because it was killing me from inside. I sat and asked myself what this was. Was it some form of love? I didn't think so. Because I didn't want a future with him. I didn't want a life with him; but something in my system wanted him. And just when I had given everything up, and wanted to unhide those emotions which were within me for almost 4 years then; that one thing happened which made me lose that obsession or that thing I was too afraid to call anything.

I fell head over heels in love, again. But with the same person who loved me. Not some third person. But him, who taught me what love is and how it is to love someone. I could see, for the first time, so clearly as to the kind of fool I had been. And shivers to think that I almost lost it. What happened to those hidden feelings? I told him [my him] all about the other him. And once it wasn't hidden anymore, I was able to breathe, to feel and to love all over again.

My own superstar, as I had called him earlier, disappeared. That incessant need to be around him, or to get his approval on something I did, died down. Today I look back upon those years, I see how much I have already lost due to the things happening in my head and my heart. Friends, memories, time all lost to a feeling I had. I regret those days. But I am also very glad I am out of that phase. Thankful to every single person in my life who in some or the other way helped me live.

And most thankful to my special someone, for making me believe that I don't need to HIDE any of my feelings and that no matter who we are, where we're from, n what we do, we'll always have each other!!

The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

Images from here and here

Dawson's Creek - Joey's Songs

2010-06-04T20:05:00.001+05:30

Why I like this more than F.R.I.E.N.D.S or One Tree Hill, I will never Understand! :)

What Joey had for Dawson or Pacey isn't monumental! Nevertheless I love it!!

I keep watching these videos.. and just wanted to share!

This is the Song which made me such a huge fan of DC in the first place!

This one's Cute.. but i think the its the Spanish Version!!

A compiled Version Of the Same!!

And This one!! I want you to want me!!

And this with the most edible n adorable Chad !!

And the theme song; how could I not have this!! I don't wanna wait!!

This one's for everyone who loved Dawson's Creek as much As me!!!!

This one was written Last Year

Its only Words!

2010-05-28T12:06:00.000+05:30

Remember "Smile,an ever lasting Smile, A smile can bring you near to me..."

When I decided to call my blog Words as a form of life, Somewhere at the back my head I had this song.

"Its only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away"

I have always wondered, why you need anything else to sustain any kind of relationship? Doesn't it start with words, and finish with them? For a long time, this was my favorite song, and I would completely abide by it.

Then, I heard this You Say it best, when you say nothing at all! And then, I couldn't stop loving the song.

Notice how things, small and big sometimes make a major difference in your lives?

It could be a song, a book, an article from a magazine you touched for the first time, a friend you made, a series of incidents, a petty love affair, a friend's love affair, money, television shows, movies, people who cheat, people who suffer, people who love and people who teach.

These differences make us who we are. Its not where you do your graduation, or what you do in post graduation, its not where you work or how much money your dad has.

I relate to that person today. The person I am because of the differences made in my life. They needn't be good; but they define me in some way. Am I the same person I was a couple of years ago? No.. Well, Am I the same person I was A couple of weeks ago? Still no! Do I love this person, despite all the change, hell yes! Then why do people find it difficult to accept others who have changed? Why is it that people tend to have problems with people because they have changed? Would you stop loving yourself for the changes in you?

Its been more than a year since I moved to Mumbai, and almost 10 months since I wrote this. A whole universe has changed from then and now. Work, politics, work politics, Friendships, Roommates, Romance, Relatives and equations between all of them have changed. And all this within Mumbai. And the world outside of that - phew, I don't know where to begin! Bangalore, Delhi have made me realize that home can be anywhere as long as there is love and warmth, And there are those people who I can share my feelings with and those I can spend my time in silence without having to say a word, still feeling complete.

So today, even though I feel so completely the same person I was in Class 8; I am not her. I have grown up (and big) from then, and I have completely trusted my path whichever I have taken, to be the best one for me.

There could've been improvements, but I would not trade this for anything else. For all the mistakes I have made, the lessons I have learnt, I will forever be grateful to every single person who made the DIFFERENCE in my life. Because Its Only Words which keep us connected to this world we live in. And these Words are our life, if not just A form of Life!!!

Too deep for a Friday post, huh? Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!! :D

Remember Me!

2010-05-19T02:04:00.002+05:30

Thank God Edward Cullen is a Vampire!

It hurts so much to see Robert Pattinson die; even though they haven't shown him dead!!

Of the many movies I watched these days, I think I liked Remember me the best. It said so much more than I think the movie was trying to say. And I didn't like it just because it had Robert Pattinson in it; He's good yes, but the movie on the whole was very well made.

Watching movies - Bollywood or Hollywood has been my favorite pass-time, and in the last few years, we have seen many many movies which had stories to tell which revolved around the 9/11 attack. But most stories I had seen or read, were those which happened after the attack, or something close and how it impacted the characters in the movie. But this was different. Pierce Brosnan played a very good character, the tough daddy, the throw he had, the passion, lovely. Emile de Ravin - I haven't seen Roswell or Lost [ I know, its bad.. I'll catch up ;) ] but man, was she a surprise or what? She pretty! To think she'll be 30 next year scares me!!

The movie talks about death. of. loved. ones. In different ways, it talks about difficulty. And through it all it shows love. That strange love which cannot be described in words. The love between a brother and sister is also handled with such sensitivity that I was almost in tears.

The Best part OBVIOUSLY Was Robert.

His eyes. His smile. They talk different languages at the same time! There are scenes in which his dialogue is something, his eyes are saying something else and his mouth is doing something else. On someone else it might have looked weird. But on him. ah! to. die. for!!!!!!!

A small thing from the movie; I love what it says.

Whatever you do in life will be
insignificant but it is very
important that you do it because...

You can't know...

You can't ever really know the
meaning of your life...

And you don't need to...
Just know that your life has a meaning...

Every life has a meaning... whether
it lasts one hundred years or one
hundred seconds...

Every life... And every death... changes the
world in its own way...

Gandhi knew this. He knew his life
would mean something to someone,
somewhere, somehow. And he knew
with as much certainty that he
could never know that meaning...
He understood that enjoying life
should be of much greater concern
then understanding it.
And so do I.

You can't know...

So don't take it for granted...
But don't take it too seriously...

*Don't postpone what you want...
*Don't leave anything misunderstood...
*Make sure the people you care about know...
Make sure they know how you really feel...

Because just like that...

IT COULD END

Hope this post made some sense.

FYBF! No Make Up Day!

2010-05-14T17:18:00.001+05:30

Just Came Across FYBF! at a fellow Blogger RATZ!

So Today is INTERNATIONAL BLOGGER WITH NO MAKE UP DAY!!

It requires us to put up pictures of us without make up!!

So I pick this one!!

I feel smile is all the make up we need.. This is me.. plain, simple and in love!

So People, add your selves at FYBF here!

Looking forward to new beginnings!!

Have you?

2010-05-13T00:15:00.002+05:30

Have you ever found yourself doing sooo many things, that you end up having no time for yourself?

Have you ever found no reason in almost all the things you do, but still you continue to do so?

Have you found love on a long journey, in a train, with thousands of strangers around?

Have you found a smile, in the tears which flow down your precious eyes?

Have you told your parents you love them lately?

Have you called your brother, and told him how much you miss him?

Thats me n my lovely brother!

Have you felt the spark in your throat when you want to shout out loud, in your office?

Have you read a random blog and felt that special connection?

Hopes, Dreams and Reality - When they come together - Wonderfulness!!

Have you slept well lately?? :)

Images mainly from here! :D

Beliefs / Fear

2010-05-05T17:55:00.003+05:30

When i was kid, I heard this proverb - There's nothing to fear other than fear itself!

Then. I. Grew. Up.

Grew up, with the belief that I had nothing to fear. Whenever I had to stand up for something I believed in, I did. Even at home, with mom and dad. I always supported what was right - according to me! So, in the long arguments / discussions I had with my dad, more often than not I ended up crying, as that was the only way I could gracefully lose the argument ;-)!!!

In the Indian Scenario, my parents / relatives have always told me, that they never had the guts to talk to their parents / elders about certain things. I am lucky, like that [thank god!]. I could share anything with my parents, and I did share almost everything.

Why is it not the same with my friends and cousins? Why are they always scared of sharing their thoughts
about certain issues with their parents?

We tend to hide certain things, for sure, like, you wouldn't announce at home that you have a boy friend / girlfriend. And we tell them only only when we are really ready. Or that, you drink or smoke, or something like that. Yes, it is frowned upon, we know, they wouldn't approve of it, but still, we continue doing it, by hiding it from them.

And so, when you're out with friends having a drink, and your mom calls, what do you say? When you're out with that someone special and your dad calls, what would you say? We lie. But we are not one bit ashamed of it, are we? Or if we are, do you think we are doing anything about it?

OK, I wanted to write about a completely different thing, and once I started typing, this whole parent thing came up.

I have always wondered why we create these situations for ourselves.

Today, when I look back at my days in college, I always had a nice excuse for bunking classes. But there was
no way I could tell this at home. But now, when I go back home, and tell them all (most of) the crazy things I used to do - and mom goes like - "when did u have the time to do this?" or "how come you never asked us before you went there?" .. And No, they weren't angry. And weren't hurt too... Its nice like that! :)..

How would it be when we have kids? Will they also hide stuff from us? It scares me to think that. How do you know how to be the right kind of parent?

stop! why am I even thinking off when I have kids blah blah when there's a long time to go till, I get married in the first place? Weird!

Well, contemplating on a random thought on my own blog is allowed, isn't it? :)

I guess so!! :)

OK, now I have to get back to work.. just wanted to put random thoughts in ink.. I'd like to know your sentiments about them too.. if you want...!

Love,

How much would you trust someone??

2010-05-02T01:34:00.005+05:30

How many friends of yours can you really trust?

This happened to a friend of mine, and it has sort of shocked/shaken me, because I tend to trust/ believe most of my friends and try almost always to be there when they want / need me.

My friend met this guy, lets call him Shael, in MBA training classes. One of those institutes which help students in scoring well in the MBA entrance exams like GMAT, CAT etc. Classes are usually held two -three days a week.

My friend and Shael ended up sitting with each other in a few such classes. Slowly they started hanging out together, usually post classes and sometimes even bunk class n hang out. A coffee shop, a sports bar and even long drive at times.

If I did this with someone for more than 3 weeks, that person would have been " a good friend" by the end of three weeks. Ok. This. Story. Is. Not. About. Me.
Back to my friend's story.

After a couple of months of these classes my friend got into a college to pursue his MBA. He got into a nice course and life for him went on a different course. New sets of people, new things in life. He was not in touch with SHael and a few other old friends. [ the whole thing about there being three kind of friends - for a reason, season and a lifetime ]

Almost a year later, during my friend's semester examination for MBA, Shael calls out of nowhere. He sounds all excited and happy and says he's getting married; and that he wants to meet my friend. He tells my friend stuff like, how close they were as friends, and also that he( shael ) wanted my friend to meet his fiancee and all. So, after like atleast 50-60 phone calls from Shael,my friend agreed to meet him for like 10-15 minutes. [ I wanted to know why my friend was acting so pricy n all - and in his defence he said :

a) he had exams going

b) he didn't really have time to hang out due to reason (a) and

c) when someone you haven't spoken in a really long time calls so often, it means either they want something from you or they want something from you, BIGtime! ]

So they meet in a Friendly place like McDonalds and Shael gets coke for the both of them. Then as casual conversation goes on, Shael's phone rings and he is unable to answer it because apparently the battery of his phone just died. He says it was his girlfriends call, and asks my friends phone to call her.

Since the place they were in was noisy, he takes the call outside. He walks out, talking over the phone AND HE DOESN"T COME BACK!

He takes the phone and disappears. My friend waits for this person to come back and after like 10 minutes he goes out to see where Shael is.

He thinks Shael must have just gone to pick his girlfriend from somewhere, because he is unable to accept the fact that anyone, would just walk away with the phone like that. Mind you, the phone he uses is a Blackberry [ same phone I use ;-) n I simply Louve it!!!!! ] which was just 3 weeks old and which costs about 30,000 rupees.

A couple of hours after this, he pings me on gtalk, and in a state of shock [yes, even after 2-3 hours] tells me about what just happened to him.

My first reaction to that was - Go to the Cops!! However corrupt / non-corrupt the cops in India are, they are the Police and they might be able to help.

He didn't want to. Why?

a) He had exams and didn't have time to waste with the cops ( coz thats what it would have been if he had gone to the cops - a waste of time)

b) He didn't want to tell his parents, coz they might react/over-react unfavorably and he didn't want them involved at all. ( Acc to him, its simply wrong to involve parents in problems. Me,on the other hand, like here - I would go tell mom, dad immediately! )

I then suggested, finding Shael on his own. The classes they were in together would probably have their address!! But no, he stayed in a rented flat, as he was from another city and chances are, he has already fled to another city. Thats why Shael was calling over and over again to meet with my friend.

So, on the whole, my friend didn't / couldn't do anything when this day light robbery happened to him! I was all bummed out coz doing nothing was not my cup of tea! And I was frustrated and irritated with people in general for a while.

What if your friend/ acquaintance did that to you? I have always given my phone to someone who needed to make an urgent call and something was wrong with theirs. I hope people around me would help me out, if my phone weren't working / battery was dead [ god forbid ]

This may be a TMH of a non-gross kind, but nevertheless. It has made some sort of impact on my life, and not a positive one, I must say.

Has something like this happened to you, or someone you know? How would you deal in a similar situation?

Is there anything which can undo the negative impact it has had on my life? Or is it just a lesson learnt, A big one at that!?

On a totally different note!!

Okay Peeps, Also changed my Blog template to a very very simple one! Still looking for a new one though! I think my blog needs this simple look for sometime! :P Give me ur views on it!! :D And some suggestions about finding new ones!!

Star Light, Star Bright, You make me feel alright!

2010-03-31T18:34:00.003+05:30

When you're at crossroads in life, and nothing seems to be going your way, where is the first place you look? My first choice didn't take my call, and so reluctantly I called home. I have always wanted mom and dad to see me as a strong, brave person; So to call them at one of my weakest was difficult. I think living away from home has all pros and no cons... ( who am i kidding?? Living with parents, home cooked meals, unconditional love, no paying rent!! ;-) its all cons for living alone. :P )

Well, for all the Pros for living on my own, one of them is that, however unreasonable you are, or stupid you feel, the parents only make you feel better! Now if it was me at home, and I went crying to them about something I had done, or something I hadn't done, the reactions would've been so different!

So, I turn to daddy for help, and he does a wonderful job of hand-holding and bringing me to the world of OKAYness! And I don't know if ANYone, I mean, anyONE other than him would have had the same effect.

[Thanks Dad, Louve you!!! ]

This happened a couple of months ago, and my view towards certain stuff has shifted. I have always believed in giving my hundered percent in everything I do, and more often than not, I do!

In a previous post I mentioned, I need to learn to prioritze my life. Because there are sooo many unnecessary things I do; And so many things which ae necessary things which I blindly avoid. Like, Its high time I start working out again, I am just unable to get up early in the morning! [ what with sleeping at 3 - 4 a.m ]

I also have to re-start studying; for MBA admissions. And I need to do really well in those exams. But what am I doing instead? Giving my all to my ~~not so great~~ job! And getting involved in unnecessary discussions. The worst part is I know what I am supposed to do and what I am not supposed to; but still why don't I?

I will start next week onwards. Both workout and studies! :) Why? Coz this weekend I am going Home sweet Home to meet my Mommy and Daddy dearest!! O goodness, I miss them sooo much!! How can someone live without their loved ones around them?? :D [don't read the beginning of the blog :P] Once I'm back, I'll start with being Organized!! :D

So, this girl is all shiny and bright because of her Star..!! Who's shining.. and bringing light to her life. Love you daddy!! Love you Mommy!! Other than biological reasons too, I wouldn't have been me, if it wasn't for you two.

And and and... This Year is their 25th i.e Silver Jubilee Wedding Anniversary!! So there's going to be loads of Celebration this year!!! :D :D:D

All you happy people out there - Loads of Hugs, Kisses and Love!!! Hope all your Star Light make you Feel Alrite!!!!!!

Expectations!

2010-03-25T20:45:00.003+05:30

According to Wikipedia : "In the case of uncertainty, expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen. An expectation, which is a belief that is centred on the future, may or may not be realistic. A less advantageous result gives rise to the emotion of disappointment. If something happens that is not at all expected it is a surprise. An expectation about the behavior or performance of another person, expressed to that person, may have the nature of a strong request, or an order."

What does Expectation mean to you? It can be the smallest thing, or something really huge. I learned something very early in life-do NOT expect anything from anyone. ANYONE. And I didn't.

Over the years,there were people who became close to me, and expectations are normal in any relationship. Even with parents, not being able to do well in school/ college meant we didn't live upto their expectations. And somewhere, I knew I hadn't done as well in academics as my dad would have wanted me to. When I learnt the lesson of not expecting anything from anyone, I also knew, I had to live upto every single expectation people I love had of me.

So, it was tough for me; living up to people's expectations. If you notice, more often than not, people will always, ALWAYS remember the ONE thing you didn't do for them, (like here), and very conveniently forget the million things which you have actually done for them. And then there are usually two things that happen! Either the person judges you in a bad way for not living up to their expectations, or, you start going on this huge horrible guilt trip of your own.

I used to have loads and loads of friends. Today I have a select few, and sometimes I'm glad about the select few coz' its them that matter; but why does it hurt, when I see my other friends, who were very good friends move away? Am I doing something wrong? Or is that normal? Do i push too hard to be friends with some people that I ignore others? [ i think NOT]

Why am I finding it difficult to be happy, why does it have to hurt. Loads of introspection leads to me to think of it as - I do it to myself. But the question is WHY??

And then there's also that, when you trust someone, and they don't stand by that.

One of my Favorite trust quote is:

WHEN YOU TRUST SOMEONE TRUST HIM COMPLETELY WITHOUT ANY DOUBT....... AT THE END YOU WOULD GET ONE OF THE TWO : EITHER A LESSON FOR YOUR LIFE OR A VERY GOOD PERSON!!! :) :D

Neat huh?? ;-)

One Tree Hill!!

2010-03-10T18:56:00.005+05:30

I started watching One Tree Hill, the same time I posted my previous post. And since then I haven't done much more in my free time with the laptop! Hence all blame for no new posts goes solely to OTH!

But my dear friend who gave me OTH gave me season one, two, six and seven!! He forgot to give me 3-4-5!!

I sat and read through everything available on these seasons,but it isn't the same as watching it! I tried to figure out what might have happened, in the previous seasons. Like, who's Miah, or Lindsey, Or, Chase.. and what happened to Peyton's real mom ( i know she died of cancer, but what happened?? ), Why everyone hates Victoria Davis so much? and most importantly... Why did Dan kill Keith and how!!

I must be sounding so shallow in the above portion, right? I can't really help it. I think this is the power teen drama has over me! My weakness of sorts. It was the same, or probably worse with Dawson's Creek! ( but you already knew that ) Is this the same for many people, or is it just me??

I am watching the 7th season of OTH now, and it doesn't have Lucas(Chad Michael Murray - Yummy) n Peyton. I thought I'd lose interest, coz i watched it only, only for Lucas! but na.. I still watch it. I sit all night through! ( Bad me, I know) I have to watch it!! When it was HIMYM; it was a similar craziness, but wasn't the same, coz how ever much I loved barney, it was never the same way I love Luke!! Or I loved Dawson n Pacey. ( Chad was in DC too.. yummmm ).

I am sounding so unlike myself in this post; but i think it is a OTH after effect. I sometimes talk like Peyton, or even Brooke and it creeps me out!! O ya, I forgot to mention, but I so love Jamie Lucas Scott too.. he is simply adorable!!!!

Isn't he yummmmy???

Nevertheless, I like it, and thats me..! And this is my blog!! and I can write about whatever I want!!! :D

Aaaahhh!! Miss writing sooo much!! :D

I just re-read it! Eew - do i really talk like this???

Love is in the Air!

2010-02-08T20:12:00.003+05:30

Its Valentine week, and I am super excited!! If only I didn't have this work!

I am missing all the people I love.. and missing Valentine's 2009 loads!!

I have moved away from loads of things and people this last year.. But My feelings towards them hasn't changed! I still love them dearly.. and keep them very close to my heart!!

Happy Valentine Week People!! Do let me know what you guys are upto! :)

Confusion: does it require a Confession?

2010-02-05T23:54:00.000+05:30

Not having a goal in life leads to confusion... with most of the important decisions in life!

I have no place of my own; physically and in people's lives, except you( my love )!

I don't know where to go... I keep screwing up stuff.. and it hurts... but I still am true to myself ( i think )!

Now;I have goals.. the only thing is that I am not doing anything about it!! I should start!!! when???????

Ok..sorry if i have confused you.. but I am sort of thinking in print!!

BTW.. I am in love.. and that is not going to change.. ( again.... I think )

Rishikesh!!

2009-12-29T12:11:00.004+05:30

A wonderful trip with loved ones, to a fantastic place!! Loads of adventure and loads of bonding!! Thats what it was!!! I think everyone must go to Rishikesh at least once in their lifetime!!!

the silvery white sand beach by the river Ganges@our camp

The tents in which we lived in, maintained really well..!

The river Ganges, we were right in middle of the river during our Rafting session!!

[AWESOMENESS REDEFINED]

the simple beauty of the place with peace and tranquility!

trying something stupid! with poo's floaters! lol!!

The River Rafting Team!! :D

DRAMA is our middle name!! :P

One of my best trips so far!!

So, what have you been doing lately?? ;-)

Delhi in December!!

2009-12-08T11:26:00.001+05:30

Not like I am really busy or something, I was just on a read only phase for quite sometime. But as I woke up this morning I missed writing sooo much,that I was like - Lets get back with a Bang!! Well, no bang happening here but ya, I am writing and I love it!

I am on a long holiday from work!! :D By long, I mean 10 days off work including three weekends! So, Yaay Me!! There were a few work things to sort out with my manager as he sits in Delhi, but that is not happening apparently!! I hope the IBM Manager Feedback program comes back quickly!! I need to give serious Feedback!! :P

But this has been a beautiful trip, uptil now! Tonight is a friend's wedding, and he being a very close friend of mine, I am all excited!! Many of my friends are getting hitched, its like a wedding season! I am scared my parents will start bugging me of that... But its a very nice and festive season around!!

I finished reading the Twilight series, Finally!! And I loved it!!! :D Team Edward till the end of time!!!

Last But not the least, if i was in love before, I don't know how to put what I am in now, in words! Its simply beautiful. Why can't I be here, with him, forever! :) Wishful thinking!! We went to an amazing fort, this weekend and its raw beauty is soo romantic! And to have him around me, was even better!!

ONE YEAR!

2009-11-17T16:12:00.000+05:30

17 November 2008 - was a bright Monday morning!! I was sooo excited

from the night before, that I couldn't sleep all night. I was on a conference call with my friends till about 3-4 in the morning [ which was a usual thing for me .. ] and then laid on my bed awake till my alarm at 6:40 a.m started playing my favorite song.

I woke up, got dressed and left home on my "Activa" zooming into the cold gusts of wind on a Cold but bright Bangalore Morning.

I reached on-time. Nervous, with butterflies in my stomach, but a BIG SMILE on my face I entered the premises and saw a big board on the wall. IBM India Pvt. Ltd. My first day at work was this very day last year.

IBM has been a wonderful journey and the last one year has been superlative - well obviously rite? who wouldn't like a job where we got paid for the first two months just to introduce ourselves to each other n have fun?? :)!! That's what we did!

We were called "Vitality Hires" - and I personally had no idea how that would impact my stay here, but in those initial days, it was considered something really special.

It was very unusual, the experiences we had, during our training days. We had an Outward - bound learning and team-building stints at PEGASUS. 20 people of which almost everyone was new to each other were sent to a 2 day camp were there were loads of tasks, planning and Bonding that happened!

And post that we had 6 months of rigorous training on all the services, service product lines, brands, sub brands in IBM. We met leaders of IBM not only from India, but also leaders from Asia and Australia. From Servers to Software, From Applications to services we were shown a view of IBM which included everything but still wasn't enough.

I think the best part of the whole journey was the friends we made. We have a kind of connect with each other which is in-explainable!! I love them to bits and today when all of us are distributed across the country, I miss the presence of each and everyone who isn't with me in Mumbai. And for those who're here - my life here has been wonderful mainly mainly because of them!!!

Those funny/crazy outings in Bangalore, the tea-breaks and lunch breaks in office, cribbing about staying late inside office and staying out for looong hours after office, the "booze" parties, the "only girls" parties, the birthday surprises, the fights, the arguments, the hugs every morning and every evening, the looong conversations by the 6th floor window, the pictures we clicked without any rhyme or reason, the stay-overs(for me), the bike rides, the skits, the videos, the "presentations", victory, failure, bliss, disappointment, the "Sametime" conversations.... Every single thing in that happened during those days - I miss them!! But I am glad I got to do all these things!!

It doesn't seem like a long time, when, I think of all the things that has happened this year on a personal and a career front. Well this was the only year I had a career - so... :) Thank you IBM! for everything, but most importantly for the friends it gave me!!

Love you guys Loads!!!!!

You really want to know me?

2009-11-13T11:21:00.003+05:30

This is a tag blog! I liked this for reasons unfathomable even to me!!

I stole it from Navneet's Blog!! :) Here it is:

LAST TIMES…

1. Last beverage: my glass of water!

2. Last phone call: Yeshas & Swati

3. Last text message from : <3 Ankur <3

4. Last song you listened to: Truly Madly Deeply - ( my playlist was on shuffle )

5. Last time you cried: Last Saturday - 7 November :-)

HAVE YOU EVER...

6. Dated someone twice: Yes

7. Been cheated on? : No.. ( Can I be mean and say Not Yet?? ;) )

8. Kissed someone & regretted it?: Hmmm.. Yes.

9. Lost someone special? Yes

10. Been depressed? O Yes!!

11. Been drunk and threw up? Been drunk, No, not as drunk I wanted to be; threw up, Yes, in "our Vegas"

LIST FOUR FAVORITE COLORS:

12. Black

13. White

14. Purple

15. Red

:) :D :P :* :)

FIRSTS :

16. Made new friends: PP - Pooj [we're Day 0 friends ] ( the same one I went to GOA with )

17. Fallen out of love: Yes... But where it really matters I fell right back in!!

18. Laughed until you cried: When dad used t tickle me!! ( he has some special way of doing it )

19. Met someone who changed you: Lots of people have changed me - in bits and pieces !!

20. Found out who your true friends were: School Friends, Pre University Friends (SKARD) - some of the members in that atleast.

21. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes! and when it is your best friend - not so good! [All's well now]

HAVE YOU:

22. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: Yes, I have.

23. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Well, apart from my blog friends, 98% of the people I know on Facebook, I know in real life!!

24. How many kids do you want to have: One or Two.

25. Do you have any pets: No, Not yet!

26. Do you want to change your name: When I was a kid; Now I don't!!

27. What did you do for your last birthday: Went to work, and had a party with loved ones!!! <3 <3 <3

28.What time did you wake up today: 07:40 a.m

29. What were you doing at midnight last night: Multi-tasking! ;) I was On Facebook and reading Blogs on my Favorites and talking over the phone!

30. Name something you CANNOT wait for : To Lose Weight!!!!!!

31. Last time you saw your father: 02 November 2009 :)

32. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: My Weight - yes i have weight issues!!

33. Most visited web page: Facebook, Blogger(obv) and Gmail!!

WHAT'S YOUR :

34. Name: Deepika

35. Nicknames: Deeps, Deepu, Dippy Sauce, D!

36. Zodiac sign: Aquarius

37. Male or female or transgender : Female - very much so!

38. Elementary: M.E.S KK, B'lore

39. Colleges: Atria Institute of Technology

40. Hair color: Black... :)

41. Long or short: Used to be shoulder length, now is a couple of inches below the shoulder

42. Height: 5'3.5 ( Five feet and three n a half inches )

43. Do you have a crush on someone? Which someone are you talking about??? No :)

44. Ever been in love? If this is what Love is, Yes!! :)

45. Piercings? Earlobes!! Wish I had one on my face, but don't think I'll get the permission!

46. Tattoos? I will get it, one day!

47. Righty or lefty: Righty ( if that is a word )

48. First surgery: None, Yet!

49. First piercing: 12 days after I was born!

50. First best friend: Bhavana Mutangi ( I Have no idea where she is today; but we were best friends in pre-school and first grade)

51. First sport you loved: Swimming :)

52. First pet : None!! :(

53. First vacation: Mumbai!!!! When I was less than one!! ;-)

54. First concert: Bryan Adams in Bangalore.

55. First crush: One of the care takers in Kodaikanal ( he had long hair and was ccute - I was in class 4 )

56. Eating: Chocolates, Chicken, Cakes and Food made by my Mom!!

57. Drink: Variety - thats the spice of life, innit?

58. I'm about to: Start working for the day!! :P

60. Waiting for: The evening, its Friday!! And my friends from Pune are here!!! :D Partayyyy!!

YOUR FUTURE

61. Want kids? Yes!!!

62. Want to get married? Yes and to my special someone!

63. Careers in mind? Now, IBM, Post MBA - Some nice creative job - In the end, I want to be a dance teacher!! :)

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?

64. Lips or eyes: Eyes ( Any Sex )

65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs

66. Shorter or taller: Taller :)

67. Older or Younger: Both! Older actually!

68. Romantic or spontaneous: this shouldn't be a question, It should be Romantic AND Spontaneous

69. Nice stomach or nice arms: Nice Arms

70. Sensitive or loud: Loud when he should be, sensitive when he should be!

71. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship! :)

72. Trouble maker or hesitant: Neither.. ;)

HAVE YOU EVER :

73. Kissed a stranger: Hmmm... Yes!

74. Lost glasses/contacts: No :)

75. Been on a blind date? : Does meeting a guy you know online count?

76. Broken some one's heart: Yes :-(... but joined it right back!! :P

77. Had your own heart broken: Maybe, I don't know!

78. Been arrested: No.. :)

79. Turned someone down: Yes

80. Cried when someone died: YES

81. Liked a friend that is a girl?: hmmm.. NO!! ;)

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

81. Yourself: I am trying to.

82. Miracles: Unfortunately, yes! :)

83. God: Sometimes :)

84. Love at first sight: No.. yes.. no, maybe No!

85. Heaven: Yes..

86. Santa Claus: Yes.. :)

87. Kiss on the first date? : No

88. Angels: Yes

89. Devils: If there is a God, then Yes! :)

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

90. Is there one person you want to be with right now? Yes! And I am so far! :(

91. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? No...

92. Wanted to kill someone ever? : Yes.. Myself.. :P

93. Among your blog mates, whom would you like to kiss? I like this question, I don't think I'll answer though.. :) :P

94. Committed a blunder and regretted later? Yes, but then regretted regretting it.. :P

95. Wanted to steal you friend's boyfriend / girlfriend? : Yes, Sort of!

ASSOCIATE WITH SOMETHING YOU WEAR :

96. White: Dupatta / Stole

97. Black: Everything - Inside out! :P

98. Red: my someone's favorite color (on me)

99. Pink: My favorite cotton dress!! :)

You Can take this tag up, if you like, I am not tagging anyone specific!

Enjoy!! Have a lovely weekend!! :D

October :)

2009-11-04T11:39:00.000+05:30

A long hiatus since I've visited this place, and all your beautiful blogs in a while; but this past month has been like a roller coaster in my life!! I had been extremely caught up in this thing called life! New home, new responsibilities and a love life of sorts; and if this wasn't enough I had to attend my busy schedules at Cafe World on Facebook! :) :) :)

The end of the month was wonderful, as I had my brother [ who is pursuing his graduation in the 6th best Enginnering College in India - yaay! I'm sooo proud of my baby brother!! ] visit me! It was amazing amazing bonding with him!! He's all a big boy now! I took him around Mumbai, we saw "Julie and Julia" together..!! And I missed blogging soo much! I could relate to most of the things Julie did while blogging! How every comment matters, how sometimes the response of certain people online has more value than probably someone in real life!! All you fellow blog friends out there, I think it should be a must watch!!

Well, after getting loads n loads of stuff for him to eat, we went to my most favorite place in Mumbai - "Marine Drive" I love that place, It gives me a sense of satisfaction, a sense of individuality; but I think, I've always mentioned this, so I won't go on and on about it! :)

My parents also came to town, and it was very nice meeting them after three long months! Its surprising to see how equations with your parents change once you start living on your own, and you're not as dependent on them as you used to be, physically, emotionally and financially! And they also stop treating you like a baby, and respect your individuality. I miss my parents dearly but I think living on my own, on my own terms and conditions, making mistakes, learning from them is wonderful too.

And the month literally ended ( well, as November just began ) with my Cousin's engagement. Family fun is sooo much fun here in Mumbai, and this time my brother got to be a part of it. Now, all i want is for November to sweetly get over, as, I am waiting for December. :D

Ok, Before I forget!! I want to Thank Sid for these three wonderful awards!! I don't know how much I deserve them, as I was on a blog break! But hey, thats what blogs are for... aren't they! Blogs are those friends who are there, always, no matter what, they are there for you, right? Unless, ofcourse it gets hacked.. :P :)

Ok so the three awards are: Butterfly Award for The Coolest blog :) [ ice, ice baby ;) ]

and.. The Awesome Blogger Award - [Yaaaay me!! ;)]

and... The Blog Buddies Award!!

I am not going to be mean, and keep all the awards for myself; but the distribution ceremony will be made in a post dedicated only to it!! Thanks again Sid, and I hope the writers block disappears!

I promise to write more often too!! Love y'all loads!! Happy November! :D

Moving from One place to another : houses and in life!

2009-10-14T17:25:00.003+05:30

Last Sunday, I finally shifted from my aunts place to a small flat, which I'll be sharing with 3 other girls!! Yes, the same house I was talking about here, if you recollect!

For the first time, I have been living with complete strangers, and although my well-wishers and friends were skeptical about this decision of mine, they've supported me, and the roomies are awesomme! :D :D!!

So what if they are 4-5 years older than me? They have lived on their own for such a long time, and are there to guide me, and help me not make the same mistakes they made when they were new! They're loads of fun!

Ok, So why haven't I been blogging lately? No, I haven't been busy with my roommates, I wish I was though, I had been away to another aunt's place coz' it was long overdue. And after that I did something which I really can't say here, Because, a) its much much worse ( or better, depends on how you take it) than this and this and b) If I tell you, then I'd have to Kill you! :P but mainly it is c) Its too personal and I cannot share it here, yet, but whatever it was, it was simply amazing!!!!!

Love this Pic - that's the 4 of us in Goa, and another one who clicked this!!

Life was at cross-roads some days ago, and now it is crystal clear. Why do things happen when you least expect it? Have you ever felt that before? That you are looking for something, with all your heart and soul, and when you don't find it, all the passion seems to die down, and then from nowhere, miraculously, you feel that your questions have been answered!

And it need not always be a good thing. The same can happen when its not such a good thing too. But right now, its the good things we'll focus on! :)

In general, in a relationship, when things aren't perfect, or not going your way, why does the person end up being blamed? Why not the situation? When you have loved someone so dearly, why would you belittle them because of some non-important thing? And why is it that, when you've decided not to love anymore, you cannot not love that person, who taught you what love is? Who was there in your journey learning, along with you about love? Isn't life all about finding happiness in small things? Isn't life about making tiny compromises [ with or without your liking in it] but living it nevertheless?

What makes us, the "know-all" about life n love anyway? We are all learning every single day of our lives, aren't we?? Is it wrong to change your opinion? Can decisions once taken not be changed when you actually see the impact of a probable wrong decision? It is about moving on... from "here" to "there".

And what matters are those people who are with you, "here" and "there", and also those who were only "here", but not there, coz they've helped you get "there" in some way or the other, and about people who are going to be "there" who will make "there" better than "here" or the other way round, but you end up gaining! Experience. You stand a winner, no matter what you've been through - either "here" or "there"! :)

P.S: I have no idea how I started talking about stuff here!! ;) I think its the blog magic!! I'd love to hear from you guys about my haphazard state of mind anyway:) :) :)

Apologies!!

2009-10-04T14:07:00.001+05:30

I haven't been in my element lately. I personally didn't like my previous post! Mind was elsewhere!!

Remember a post in which I mentioned I had the almost perfect guy, but I gave up on him? I broke up with him?? Well, yes. I did!! And from then to now, both of us have grown up and changed considerably. I suddenly realised i don't think I don't love him! You know what I mean??

Being together for almost 4 years, I have always always wanted him to give me a surprise! But him being the cancerian guy that he is, has always told/consulted/mentioned everything to me. Be it a gift, a party for me, or even an outing planned.

He had to wait for us to be away from each other to actually ACTUALLY give me a surprise!! And O sweet god, it was one of the best journeys of my life. The surprise he gave, the conditions which it lead to, and the "stuff" between us and where it is now! Its extremely confusing!! But I'd love to put it into words, than being thoughts creating ruckus in my head!!

Its soo new and fresh, either it feels totally different, or I hadn't felt this before!! More about this when I organize my thoughts!! :D

<3 <3 love you guys!! Need ur support!! and have a fabulous weekend!!

P.S: I had a major bonding session with one of my Guys from mumbai!! so me happy abt that too.. :P!!! :)

The Weekend that Was!!!

2009-10-03T15:52:00.002+05:30

It all started with PP* and me deciding that we needed to bond further, and strengthen our already strong friendship of 22 years!! We're DAY 0 Friends! ;-) Meaning, We've known each other from the time I was brought into this world(she's older than me by 1 year)!! We also wanted a nice vacation, since we've been working without any holiday for too long. We narrowed down on the place - The Party Destination of India - GOA!!

Knowing each others dads, and how we've been brought up, we were skeptical about them giving us permission to actually go to Goa, as we were supposed to be "girls only" and its not very safe. So as usual, we planned a back up plan! But to our utter surprise, both dads said ok immediately!! [ notice how good we are, when we still ask for permission when we're 22 & 23 respectively ]

So I generally happen to mention this at work the next day, and I had friends from office who also wanted to join in! With PP, another college friend of mine said she'd join in, and so did PP's people! It was just gonna be a girl gang party! The dates were fixed, our accommodations were booked, the only thing not confirmed were our mode of travel. We zeroed down on trains and finally, just somehow managed to reach Goa!! [ the train journey itself is another story - a love story of sorts infact which deserves a post of its own]

I am not mentioning a major part of our trip; which I will in a future blog! It is sort of a surprise!! :D [hint: I think I am in love all over again - and this time with my guy ;)]

The girls were awesome fun!! We went to most of the beaches and were playing loads n loads in the water!! :))!! There was a certain incident when a sidey guy walked up to us and asks us where we are from! [Don't know where he gathered the guts from, but kudos to him!] He was a creepy looking guy, and we pretended to ignore him. Then he says - "Tell me no pulease"! We give him dirty looks!! Then he says - " are you not interested in me??" in a very very indian ghati accent! yuck! PP looks at him and says NO! And he does a very sweet puppy face and leaves!

And then we did Hookah!! And I am soo in love with the Hookah! It gives you a high that even alcohol doesn't. Smooth, delicious and that little tipsyness! Its not like we've not done this before, but there, in goa, by the sea shore, the wind, the water and the hookah - lovely feeling!!

Then by about 11:00 p.m we hit Tito's! An amazing nightclub! Where we danced and danced till the DJ played the last song at about 4:00 a.m :) I love dancing, and I love my friends!! So, you can imagine my delight.

The next day, tired as we were we played UNO till lunch time. Then headed to a fantastic lunch place after which we went to an extremely beautiful fort. The view from that place was simply exhilarating!! Jet skiing was awesome! which was done at a beach close to the fort; even if it was off season!!

One of my friends is moving to Boston for 6 months! So we had a surprise send off party too with yummy chocolate pastries and played a game similar to poker till the 6 tequila shots and the rest could keep me awake !!

O yeah, and before that, we got body art done!! :D

I was riding a two wheeler after aages!! and that was fun too!! :) It is a place where everyone should go, atleast once in their lifetime!!

For the party, we picked up something to add some spice! Our Horny Hats!! ;) All night all we were talking about was how someone is hornier than the other [based on the light glowing, n nothing else :P]

I don't want to say anything else, until a future post when I can tell you guys EVERYTHING!!

I love the girls!! n they're simply superb!!

Sid, Thank You for More Awards!! Will do the due in another post! :)

My Firsts!! :) First Award and First Tag!!

2009-10-01T18:45:00.004+05:30

Like I promised in my previous post, I will do this in a better way!!

So, first n foremost Thank You Samadrita for my First Award!!! :D

These are her rules for them:

1.)You have to display the award in your sidebar mentioning who you got it from with a link to his/her blog....well in this case my link (well wouldn't you say I deserve a li'l gratitude? :D)
2.)You can keep this award only to yourself or pass this on to more deserving bloggers of your choice.I leave the decision to you.(I'd say pass it on to others...spread the warmth)

Its so strange, I through out my posts, the one thing which I have gone relentlessly about is about my friends and what friendship means to me! So, when my first award is "The Circle Of Friends" Award!!

Time for sharing the love!! Sharing is caring, isn't it? ;) <3 <3

I present this fabulous award to :

Smart Ass Sara: Her Organized Chaos is a wow read!! Plus her presence makes me feel extremely special!!

Andhari: This Insomniac Lolita is awesome!! If you haven't read her yet, do now!! :)

Archana: I know She as already received this one, nevertheless, I wanted to give it to her!!

Gloria: Her Spanish View is an extremely cute blog!!

Urvashi: Her Corner has loads of nice goodies!!

Vidhu!! : Here darling is ur Award!! :) You're already in my circle of friends!!

Krissy: She is Krissy, and now, She's in my Circle of Friends!!

Well I love loads of blogs!! And I keep Commenting :)

Sometimes, I just read and not comment, but that doesn't mean I love them any less! :)

Looking forward to more!! ;-)

Now for the TAG: Brand Power!!

Sid tagged me to do this one, and though I am not a Brand whore, I do have a couple I can name!! ;)

I wake up with this and I go to sleep with this, I know its time to change, but I don't want to give up on this!

My Darling Sony Ericsson Phone!!

My Soap, Shampoo, Conditioner is Dove!! Feels sooo good!! :D I used to use L'oreal, but drifted to this after Mumbai Happened. Planning to move back to L'oreal soon, as my rebonded hair needs it! ;-)

The Second Most Popular Brand in the whole world,

Second only to Coke, is the Company I work for - IBM!

My Wrist watch, Yes it was a gift! So what? I still louve my watch!! and its DKNY!! :)

My Bag: A Bulchee!!

And well Many Many More, But nothing specific coming to my head right now!!

A loads happened this weekend!! And the next post is about that!! So in my head right now is only only that!! :D

O yeah! Anyone one who wants to do this Tag can go ahead and do that!! The question is about Choice my dearies!!

Changes Galore!!

2009-09-25T00:14:00.002+05:30

As you can see, I have changed the template on my beloved blog!! :) I used to feel the old one was too plain; but the new one I think is looking too full! Is it really loads of things on one page? Or am I feeling it as opposed to its blank empty look! [And Yes, I am huge lover of black and purple, what, I can't be??]

Help!! :)

Suggestions are welcome, and all those who are Pro's with blogger, tell me if I've done anything wrong, or if there is more for me to do!!

O ya, before I forget! Samadrita, Thank You for my First Award!! And Sid, I shall do the tag soon!! Thanks for my first tag too!! :D

P.S: Samadrita: I will do the formal thank yous and posting of the Award a little bit later!

P.P.S: Major plans this weekend! Will tell you about it once I'm done with it!!

*Hugs* *loads of them* *kisses* *loads of them too*

It just isn't the same!

2009-09-22T12:34:00.008+05:30

Another Blast from the Past!

This weekend of the many many things I did, I also met with one of my closest friends from Bangalore! I was meeting her after a couple of years. Strange, I was in B'lore till about 5 months earlier and we hadn't met once. And now, in another place, another place in life we meet.

You cannot help but notice how much the other person has changed from the last time you met them. We used to be "best friends" in school. We used to do everything together, used to tell everything to each other. There wasn't a single thing about each other that we didn't know. We even fell in "love" (who knows what love was when they're in class 9-10) with the same guy! :P :). Yes, it did create an awkwardness later; but we worked it out. Then, something happened. Till this day, I have no idea regarding what the something was, but the events that followed that "something" was very disturbing to my entire being, that we drifted apart.

After class 10 we were in different junior colleges, and the worlds we lived in were very apart. Most of my friends/fellow school mates were together with me in junior college, and everyone knew we used to be best friends, and everyone always asked me how she was doing, what she was doing and those other questions people always ask during small talk. Yes, we were in touch again, and we knew what the other was doing, but it wasn't the same.

I had many many many other friends, and so did she. We met few times, we updated each other about all major events in life like - getting asked out, saying yes, examination results, winning the dance competition, buying a new two wheeler, breaking up, getting back, health of family, what our brothers are doing, and wishing each other on birthdays, new years, valentine's and friendship days. But, it wasn't the same. There was a proverb which she had told me when we were in class 8 - "Friendship is like a vase, once broken can be rejoined, but the crack remains!" I tried very hard to correct it, to make things back to how it was, I couldn't.

Now, after 7 years of not being "best friends" to still be able to connect with each other feels wonderful! Busy in lives of our own, to take time out, sit by the sea with the waves hitting the shore and the wind touching your cheek ever so softly and sharing thoughts and ideas about life is a peaceful feeling.

the two of us with the sea was in front of us :)

Today, I am happy it isn't the same. Because if it was, then we couldn't have experienced something so beautiful. The best part still, is to be able to sit with each other, not say a thing, and still feel the other persons presence. We aren't those girls who used to stand next to each other in the assembly in school every morning; we aren't those who sit next to each other at lunch every afternoon; we are not the girls who walk around the school campus dragging the cycle every evening; well, not anymore! But we still are those girls who at the end of every telephonic conversation fight about who's going to cut the call, and then alternatively say 1,2,3 and simultaneously "bye" and cut the call together - something we have been doing from when we were in class 4!! :) :D

Happy Tuesday Everyone!!

Do you Plan?

2009-09-21T04:06:00.004+05:30

Just a thought!

When we plan for life, what is it that we are really trying to achieve?

And what about the plan Life has for each one of us?

Which plan are we moving according to?

And why is planning necessary, or is it??

Well these thoughts made their way into my head today, again! I wanted to put them down before I forget!! By the way, I had an amaazing weekend!!! Danced for about 2-2n a half hours without a break after a loong time!!! :D I love dancing and will do something about it; *plan, but too sceptical to use that word here!!*

Since this post is mainly of questions; I'd like yo know if you had answers;;

I Cannot believe I Just did that! Part Deux & The Tattoo Taboo

2009-09-16T11:57:00.013+05:30

No, this isn't another post about how everything i typed disappeared. This is a post where I talk about doing something I have never done before. Before, you all think of some heroic stunt I might have pulled off, let me assure you, what I did has nothing to do with any achievement of any sort.

I went to see "THE UGLY TRUTH" all alone! :D

I have always wondered how someone can go to the movies all by themselves? I have always, always had someone I could take along and the concept of going alone was an alien one. More often than not, I used to see movies with groups of friends. And there are movies which I've seen with my special someone, and those which I've seen with my closest friends. But never alone. [I think I already made that point]

I loved the experience; I didn't think I would, but I did! And I want to thank Gerard Butler for that! He is simply Amazing!!!! How can anyone not love him?? I liked him in 300, then P.S I Love You happened. Having read that book, I had loads of expectations from it. It didn't live upto all of them, but Gerard Butler was the best Jerry there could ever be!! And in the Ugly truth, When he says all men want is lust and sex and to take control; you actually want to listen to him.. ;-)!!!

So, I'm done with the I cannot believe I did that portion.

In my previous post(which I couldn't post) I wanted to talk about tattoos too. One of my dear friends in Mumbai, got one done recently and me being someone who has always wanted to get one, was totally ~~jealous~~ happy and excited for him! All my conversations on saturday revolved around tattoos.

Being a Hindu Indian girl, getting a tattoo, is not seen well in the society. 9 out of 10 times people(not girls alone) are judged because they have a tattoo. One conversation with my cousin that day went like this:

me: " wish i could get my tattoo and not have anyone judge me"

S: if you really want one; get it done.

me: I know, I will. Just hope dad says its ok for me to get one.

S: Big deal; my colleague has one on her ankle, so, whenever she's at home she always wears trousers or skirts which go upto her ankle.

me: thats the whole point!! why should I get one, and then hide it? especially with family!

S: yeah! u're right, why should you?

After a couple of minutes;

S: you can get one at the back of your neck and leave your hair down at work and home!

me: Well!! what does that prove? same point!

S: O yeah!!

See! Its the corporate world and all that, and there is now rule in the rule book at office which says you shouldn't get a tattoo; but if you meet someone new at work, and they haven't seen you perform but they have seen your tattoo, then they have that preconceived image of what kind of person they think you are going to be!!

It isn't fair, is it? The choice to show or hide something as personal as a tattoo should be yours and not people around you, right? Well, thats what I think! As for me getting a tattoo, albeit the pain while getting it done, it will happen soon. Yes, I did mean that I am going to get a tattoo!!!!

I wanted something small yet exotic. Chinese symbol for love? peace? Or an Aquarius symbol?? O, I don't know! But it'll be on me - soon! [definition of soon is relative isn't it? a couple of weeks, a couple of months,a couple of years]

What do you think about getting one? and if you already have one, help me decide and give me the Do's and Dont's!!

Happy Tuesday Everyone!! Hope You have a Fab week!!

I Cannot believe I Just did that!

2009-09-14T20:50:00.003+05:30

I just typed a long, very long post. All my thoughts were flowing like some river with its ice cap just melted! :P

Then?? I didn't save it, nor was it auto-saved[I wonder how] And I happened to click on Layout for some totally silly reason.

And it disappeared!!! :'( All of it!! :'( :'( :'((((

I truly cannot believe I did that!!